Ruth,
  I hope that it is not too late to respond to the mother with aches, pains,
and weight loss.  I got my mail late, but felt compelled to respond.  Before
I would suggest weaning I would try some dietary changes.  It sounds like
there may be an absorbtion problem and nutrient dificiencies.  Have they
ruled out possible infection of some kind? Thyroid problem?  It sounded like
doctors not concerned about other diseases.  Muscle cramping in different
parts of the body are commonly caused by calcium/magnesium imbalances or
vitamin E dificiency.  Anemia may also result in cramping.  Is the mother
taking any medications that can cause this kind of reaction?  like:
 Diuretics.  Does cramping occur during activity or rest?  If cramping occurs
during activity suspect circulation problem.  Vitamin E plays a role in
circulation and supl. iron interferes  with vitamin E absorbtion.
Imbalances in Calcium and Magnesium can be the result of a diet high in
phosphorus and the addition of TUMS will not help and may even interfere with
nutrient absorbtion.  A diet consisting of highly processed foods is often
the culprit of a calcium/magnesium imbalance due to it's high phosphorus
content.  Soda, diary products, eggs, meat, fish, and chicken are also high
in phosphorus.  If the bulk of the mother's diet consists of these foods that
may explain the problem.  A diet high in these foods coupled with some mild
malabsorbtion over time  would cause excess weight loss during high
caloric/nutrient expenditures such as  breastfeeding.  Another symtom this
mother would experience would be lack of energy.  I agree this mother should
be checked for other possible problems. A comprehensive history from this
mother would be helpful.  A second opinion is in order!  The ending of
breastfeeding is the easy way out.  Please let me know the outcome of this
mother.  I am always interested in dietary affects on the nursing
relationship.

Heidi C. Lunn M.S.
Nutritionist
La Leche League Leader