Jan Barger said (29 Jun)
>I suspect a lot of women stop bf early or don't bf at all because they are
>afraid of the intimacy of that relationship; yet they may not even be able to
>verbalize it.  Women who are told over and over if they pick up their babies
>too much they will spoil it -- and yet, what is nursing?  It is touching,
>picking up, holding, in the most intimate of relationships....and it is doing
>it frequently, not on a schedule....and the "fear of spoiling" [don't you
>hear this when you suggest co-sleeping??] is rampant in our society!

I right away saw positioning overtones here.  *We* all know that to hold a
baby well for nursing, you're in a full-body embrace.  *Our culture* thinks
all you need is lips-to-nipple contact, with baby trailing off the mom's
lap or propped on a pillow.  With the latter position, perhaps we're into
the delicate touch that is so irritating to sensory-defensive babies.  Are
Western moms also sensory defensive (in a way) from the frenetic,
multi-stimulus lives they lead?  And does this lips-to-nipple position -
after it stops being downright painful - therefore serve as an irritant
rather than a pleasure?  And of course it lends itself to poor weight gain,
which makes the feed a regular worry rather than an unscheduled pleasure.
A worry compounded by our need to follow the rules, which means nights,
too, become a hassle...

Just a thought.
Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC, LLLL  Ithaca, NY