Stacy,
I remember an infant who became apnic at the breast shortly after birth...
the baby seemingly calmly nursing but when observed closely was blue... I
was in the room... the parents hardly noticed.  We were able to resuscitate
the baby... the Dr. said the baby had a "near SIDS event"  I believe the
baby had swallowed quite a bit of colostrums too so possibly the baby
vomited or spit during the feeding.  Birth is a period of many changes for
the infant and defects can also be seen... shortly after birth ..as in the
one infant who had a severe heart defect and died.  There is a reason why we
as nursery and LD nurses are suppose to closely observe the infant in the
first hours after birth.  These situations are so tragic... the guilt you go
through is unbearable at times.  The only consolation you can give yourself
is the knowledge you have gained and that you aren't almighty... tragic
accidents happen, you might contact the parents they're hurting much more
then you.  Be good to yourself you will have to heal from this... 

Linda Rosetti RN, IBCLC

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