For some reason ( I know, I made a presentation at a local hospital and the
nurses met me) I'm getting a lot of calls from high income moms - not my
usual MediCal moms.  The conversations are very telling - these women have
been raised in the "equal rights" and "equal opportunities" generation. 
They want everything to be equal, and are very upset, feel negative about
the fact that now, even after the pregnancy ended - they STILL have to be
MORE active in child care giving than their husbands.  Even though the
husbands are at home, the moms want to pump their milk so Dad can give
bottles - AT THREE TO FIVE DAYS POSTPARTUM!

(Sorry to be yelling - but I kept my cool during the telephone
conversations so now I'm letting it out!)

When we talk (I always have the Dad get on the other extension, so that
they both hear my information) about baby's needs, baby's abilities to cope
with the recent separation from their mother - the Dads are willing to
help, bring pillows, bring food, change baby, burp and walk baby - but when
I ask mom to please let baby nurse "on cue" and rest when baby is resting -
perhaps with baby nearby - they go through the roof!  HE should be doing
more!  You can almost hear her say "I already did my part with pregnancy -
now it's HIS turn to suffer!!!"

Mothers -  low AND upper income - have NOT A CLUE of what baby is like and
what babies need.  How can we teach this?  Families are small, so siblings
don't see siblings cared for anymore.  Families move around so 10-12 year
olds often don't have younger cousins nearby to watch being parented.  It
is clear we need to communicate infant needs and parenting responsibilites.
 Any ideas how?

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, IBCLC
Vacaville, CA

             ***********************************************
The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html