On Sat, 29 Jun 1996 22:13:08 -0600, Belinda Bohnert wrote:
>I'm not sure I believe, at least in the US, "that childrearing is still
>reguarded as *the most important thing a woman does with her life"  I
>sometines read John Rosemonds column in the newspaper and he seems very
>much in favor of children being last in the family always, spouses first.
>I think this attitude is overwhelmingly here.  There is so much in this
>society that says seperation is best.  Bottles, cribs, pacifires, baby
>swings, all this "stuff" to keep baby occupied while Mom does her thing.
>Also if we as a society really valued our children more would stay home to
>raise them and not plop them in daycare at 4 to 6 weeks. Our motives are
>some the same schmoozing with others and entertaining, but also being able
>to work to afford what everyone else seems to have. As a stay at home Mom I
>feel little value outside my immediate family and circle of close friends.
>So daycare centers etc are those slaves and servents of those upper-class
>women, ABM and bottles are the wet nurses of that time.  We have just moved
>it from the home setting with those family servents whom probably were
>present for long term to the warehouses of daycare centers where the
>employees come and go with little thought to the children.
>So I really don't think we are so far away from vthat time you are speaking
>of where the children are valued as commodities---heirs.  Perhaps are
>values on them are different not so much as commodities but something
>different.

I have seen a coworker come out of the ladies room with tears in her eyes after
pumping her milk to send to daycare with her baby the next day, and seen the
light in her eyes as she talks about her, and when she brings the baby to work,
and I can't believe the baby is anything but the center of her life.  Even
the bottle-
feeding moms seem to light up when they talk about their babies.  One of the
bottlefeeders scanned a portrait of her daughter, and uses it as her windows
wallpaper.  I work 5 days a week, and only see my son (now 7 1/2) for a short
time in the morning and evening.  My desire to have more time at home with him
is a large part of my decision to pursue LC.  I don't think it's fair to
characterize
people who have to work as less attached to their children.  This is especially
true of single moms, who are often forced to choose between working and trying
to live on welfare (difficult at best), and deserve praise for taking the
initiative to
support themselves and their families despite all the obstacles we (society)
throw in their way.  The ones who not only support a family, but manage a home,
breastfeed and pump their milk at work are nothing less than superheroes!

I thank G-d that I could earn enough to allow my wife to stay home with my son
until he was old enough for school.  Now she teaches in a nursery school so she
can be home when he is.  I have never been able to stay at home with him, but
I consider him the center of my world, and I miss him every day at work!
Speaking for working dads, it's not fair to characterize us as less than
attached
to our children, either.

Perhaps there are people who go to work and leave their children in daycare
because they aren't attached to them, but I don't think they're even a
significant
minority, let alone the majority of working people.  Most people work because
they have to, and would much rather stay home with their kids if they could
figure
out a way to do it.  (IMHO, of course)

Jonathan
************************************************
*           L. Jonathan Kramer, P.E.           *
*      Graduate Breastfeeding Counselor       *
*         Student Lactation Consultant         *
* Only G-d knows the formula for mother's milk *
************************************************