Hello,
In reference to the discussion concerning maternity leave-I agree with all
who have brought to light the fact that our tax dollars would be better
spent on a years maternity leave building a well adjusted human being as
opposed to paying for a lifetime of services trying to fix one.
That is what our tax dollars are doing right now.  Prisons don't fix people
they teach them to be better criminals!  My whole point is that we could cut
alot of these costs if we could give every woman the opportunity to choose
the best start.  As things stand now, women don't have a choice!

In my experience, we women don't bond together easily to make these
appropriate changes.   That is evidenced by the statements here in Lactnet
that have made about how OTHER woman have been able to work and raise
healthy children in the PAST. I find we are so critical of ourselves and one
another. It's like we are in some competition or something-who has had the
harder situation or something.  If we could just find a common thread
amongst us all  (how about our children!), and look past the pain of our own
experiences, we could lobby for these changes. It all goes back to what
Kathy D. was talking about before, we bought into society's view that work
for monetary gain is more valued than the work in the home. AND,I am a firm
believer that if our society would value women and children more ( and, we
would value ourselves and other women more) and thus understand the life
shaping work done in the home-our tax dollars could go to other more
constructive avenues.

 I was sitting in the beauty palor the other day and heard my hair dresser
talking about one of her colleagues saying that she had just had a baby and
it was such an easy delivery that she shouldn't take her whole six weeks
maternity leave! I could just hear the anger in her voice when she described
her own birth experience and the horrors of it that lead eventually to a
c-section.  She told me how long it took her to get moving around and how
other women in her life told her to" buck up" that it wasn't a big deal,
"women have been having babies forever." She ended up pushing herself and
went back to work after 6 weeks because she had to.  It was hard to pump
enough milk because of being so worn out on her feet atleast 8 hours a day.
She did it though.  She broke my heart.  Did her situation make her
empathize with her colleague-NOT!  It was the same attitude- "buck up
Sister!" I see this all the time. Here goes my Benjamin Franklin speech-He
said, "That we must hang together or surely we shall hang separately!"  He
was talking about the American Revolution but, don't we need a Mother's
revolution of sorts!? Really, if we want to change society, it needs to
start with the womb!  We are going to have to get over this"buck up Sister
attitude" and find a common thread.  We have to look past our own
issues-stop comparing ourselves with the past- and work TOGETHER to change
things for the future.( for our children)  My Mother always said that if you
lead others will follow.  I think men will be less critical and more
understanding of our situations if we are more understanding of our Sisters.
Climbing down.....

Laura H. Ehrenzeller,BA,Breastfeeding Peer Counselor