Leave it to Diane Wiessinger to coin a wonderful phrase to describe weaning!
She has *such* a way with words.

I think that there are occasional children who wean strictly of their own
accord very very early (before 1 year), just as there are occasional
children who nurse until they are 8 or 9 years old, if allowed.  I wonder,
as did the original poster, if there are some significant innate personality
differences between those who wean early, the vast majority who wean on
their own between 3 and 5 years, and those who nurse well past 5 years of
age.  I may be able to get at the differences between the last two groups
with my researchon kids who nurse longer than 3, but I don't know of anyone
doing research on those who wean early.

There do seem to be some kids who *only* nurse for food -- slurp it right
down and are done, those who prefer a thumb or pacifier to breast (perhaps
those who thumb-sucked in utero), those who are much too active and
interested in the world to sit and cuddle and nurse.  Perhaps these are even
differences along a continuum from totally affectionate and cuddle to
totally un-interested in human contact (severe autism).  I don't think any
one knows.

I do think that most mothers in western industrialized countries do start
putting off nursing as the child gets older -- delaying, using alternative
methods to comfort, etc. and that can lead to weaning easily in the child
who isn't all that interested anyway, while the child who loves/lives to
nurse will continue nursing for years longer even if the mother does try to
put him off on a regular basis.

I do think that many cases of weaning before one year are simply nursing
strikes, or the results of too many solids, too much pacifier use,
encouraging night sleeping, etc.  But I think the original poster was
referring to those rare cases where the mother was letting the child nurse
often, was always available, co-sleeping, *wanted* to nurse for a long time,
and they ended up with a kid who just didn't seem to care all that much, and
weaned before a year much to the mother's disappointment and chagrin.

Anyway . . . just my .02 worth.

Kathy Dettwyler

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