Dear Friends:
        To continue Diane's good post about the woman who had heartburn that
wasn't a problem for her, it was just a new experience. I am reminded about
people who listen to mothers talk about their new babies and jump in to "fix"
things.  For example, the mother  says "My 2-week old nurses 4 times at
night." She means that this is a new situation for her and not what she
expected. The person hearing her perceives it as a problem and offers a
solution, like "Give  breastmilk substitutes" or "Use a pacifier" or "Don't
let that baby get too attached." The new mother is vulnerable to advice from
everybody. Consequently, breastfeeding gets off track. All this new mother
needed was someone to use good counseling skills and listen attentively.
"Your baby nurses 4 times at night? What is that like for you?"
        I remember learning basic counseling skills when I became involved
with the local nursing mothers' support group. What a revelation!  In both a
baccalaureate and graduate programs  in nursing, I had never been taught how
to listen and to counsel, although I could write a great care plan using
nursing diagnosis. What medical training gives any time at all in these
skills? Warmly, Nikki

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