FAR from being offended by this thread, I find it fascinating!  I did some
work in college (religious studies major, with a lot of women's studies
thrown in) and graduate school (seminary at Yale Divinity School) on the
religious roots of domestic violence and child abuse.  (two great books from
the Christian perspective are Spare the Child by Phillip Greven; and
Christianity, Patriarchy and Abuse, Brown and Bohn Editors (I think--I've
loaned both out and I don't have them to consult, but I think these are
correct spellings).  I also worked in community mental health as a therapist
to survivors (with some attachment disorders thrown into the mix) so my
interest is theoretical and practical.

the Ezzos, basically, stand in a long line of individuals who have used
Christianity to justify the abuse of children (and to sell books).  Many
churches fall into the idea that a "well behaved" child (one that eats every
four hours, poops on a schedule, and doesn't bother adults), is more
godly--this is true of the secular world as well, in its' own way.  The fact
that this happened historically shouldn't be all that surprising to any of
us, given what we all see every day.  Some women find breastfeeding
uncomfortable, are unsupported by their family or spouse, or just plain find
this style of mothering inconvenient, and are really happy when "the church"
(which always means a handful of people) tells them that they are doing
God's will somehow when they stop (or let their baby cry herself to sleep,
or spank, or whatever).  I think that there is something in human nature
that wants God to do our dirty work for us, to justify us not being our best
selves, just like we want to blame God when something bad happens, etc--but
that is another topic for another time.  LOTS of survivors say that their
abusers were justified in their abuse because they "deserved it" in Gods'
eyes!  (in social work school I also met people who had paranoid
schizophrenia, but couldn't tell their family because their preacher would
say that they were possessed.  Same logic applies).

The church is made up of humans, and we tend to mess things up like this.
We can find through our faith (whatever form that faith may take) the way to
our best selves, or we may use our religion to dehumanize other people and
get our own way.

Anisa

The Rev. Anisa Cottrell Willis, MSW/CSW, LLL Leader
Lexington, KY

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