Dayna and everyone,
        I came away with a much different take on the oprah show than Dayna.
I too watched it, taped it and reviewed it a couple of times.
        I thought it was a good start for our culture. Remember the audience
is mostly mainstream america-- bottles, cribs, crying it out,
babies/children as manipulators, etc. And I thought these two doctors (one a
ped, one a child psychiatrist) did a good job gently debunking two big
myths, toddler nursing and co-sleeping as bad. Do I recommend a follow-up
show? YES!!!!!
        The child they picked for the nursing question was unfortunate....
and the psychiatrist mentions in passing that in pre taping interviews with
the mother they realized there was more going on here than a breastfeeding
question. He was careful to say that natural weaning usually occurs, but in
*this* case he recommends cold turkey because of the severe nature of the
interactions, he felt that the negativity from the mother was worse than an
abrupt weaning, in *this* case. He then goes on to say, when asked isn't 3
or 5 or 6 too old (by oprah) that "while unusual in our culture, nursing at
5 or 6 is not in and of itself harmful." And the ped was nodding and smiling
in agreement. YES!!!!
        He also says that weaning should occur whenever the mother is no
longer willing to do it -- okay not exactly child led weaning, and they
could have made the point that there are so many benefits that the mother
should get into groups like LLL so that she will be comfortable longer...but
that wasn't the point of the show, it wasn't a show on nursing, it was as
show about age appropriate behavior.
                 I really appreciated the way they both made it clear that
whatever arrangement is chosen (from toddler nursing, family bed, temper
tantrums, etc) the rules set up must work for the family involved... could
more have been said so that people could make a more informed choice on the
matters, sure. But that wasn't the point of the show...the point was at what
age is which behavior still appropriate... and all that in just 20minutes of
air time.
        I came away hearing that children like to sleep with their parents
and nurse into pre-school years and even longer and that is perfectly fine.
Also that having a security item into college age is fine as well. I also
came away hearing that it's up to the parents to decide what they want for
their family and to not be wishy washy on their rules -- it was pointed out
that the 'giving in' after child begs for whatever is undermining to their
parental authority and causing the big blow ups. They pointed out that once
the parents decide yeah or ney to a behavior the conflict is over because
the conflict here was internal to the mothers nurse/don't nurse, sleep with
me/don't sleep with me.

yee gads, sorry this was so long, I really did edit myself....



Anne E. Robb, MAT, LLLL
Off on a Tanget, Oregon, USA
mailto:[log in to unmask]