Rachel Myr wrote:  "Women have a heightened sensitivity for remarks during
labor and the first days after giving birth.  What we say, sticks in their
memories, no matter how right or wrong it is.  I want them to remember that
I 'liked' the baby as it was, and that I didn't take sides in an imagined
power struggle between mother and baby, but viewed them as being on the
same 'side'."

Well said. I can't count how many times I've worked with a mother who has
been told something negative about her baby ("He sure is a lazy nurser!")
or about her mothering ("You're just an overconcerned mother") by a
healthcare provider--who probably had good intentions but was oblivious to
the very negative results. New mothers are vulnerable, tired mothers are
vulnerable, mothers struggling with a health issue in their baby are
vulnerable. Thinking about the potential effect of our words before we say
them can make a huge difference in a woman's experience of mothering and
breastfeeding her child. Anything that sets mother and baby against each
other is damaging to both mother and baby, to the entire experience of
mothering, and, of course, to breastfeeding.

Cynthia

Cynthia Good Mojab, MS clinical psychology, IBCLC, RLC
Ammawell
Email: [log in to unmask]
Web site: http://home.attbi.com/~ammawell

             ***********************************************

To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail
To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest)
To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet
All commands go to [log in to unmask]

The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html