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Subject:
From:
Susan Burger <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Fri, 29 Jul 2005 19:13:06 -0400
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Dear All:

I must be watching too much late night TV lately because I had some fantasies about how to 
handle the Dr. Phil show.  We could pad the show with lactation consultants and use typical 
politician style nonanswers to the questions by asking him questions about his early life --- 
nursing duration if any, pacifier use, thumb sucking, etc.  Or better yet, I started thinking about 
the wierd stuff David Letterman does and recreating it on Dr. Phil.  We could have him sit under a 
blanket and have a timed eating contest against someone else.  Or,,, maybe the sweet 
grandmotherly approach ----- I baked you this wonderful ..... (whatever is his favorite) and then 
spring it on him to try eating it under the blanket.  There is always the drinking flat on your back 
with a funnel in your mouth to recreate the bottle feeding experience that could be turned into a 
contest with heart monitors and oxygen saturation levels taken on Dr. Phil and his competitor.  
Then I was thinking about that movie that I never saw that had some actor feeding a baby from a 
fake breast.  Why not have Dr. Phil try to feed a real baby in an airplane-like chair with two people 
on either side in similar airplane-like chairs, having an SNS attached to his finger (with a nonlatex 
finger cot so the poor baby doesn't get contaminated) and his hand strapped to his chest at breast 
level.  We could have a challenge to see who could "nurse" more discretely under those 
cirumstances.  I'm envisioning the Orbitz commercial.

Better yet, lets do it on Letterman - have him ask Dr. Phil on the show to do all of these "stupid 
human tricks".  

Best Susan.

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