Cathy Bargar wrote:  "The separation bugs me too - it ties in so
closelyto the nursery "owning" the babies, and even L&D having "our
moms"!"

ITA, Cathy, but the thing is that the mother-baby separation begins
well before the birth.  IMO, it starts at conception--  how many women
do you know who say, "I just didn't believe I was pregnant until the
dr. told me."  To me this seems insane!  We are so far out of touch
with our bodies that we are virtual strangers to them:  we need
outside people to tell us what's going on with our physical selves.

This attitude is merely reinforced throughout pregnancy:  going to the
doctor to "make sure that baby is okay"  (Can't you tell that from the
baby's movements?-- and I'm not speaking about major problems here
that might need a dr's intervention, but just a general feeling of
wellness.);  needing to "see" the baby on a television screen during a
u/s to "bond..."

And then in labor mom and baby are further separated-- mom's told when
to do what, told not to rely on herself but on her doctor, told when
to push, when not to push, to lie in bed, to do whatever happens to be
the "style" of the HCP.  Even the word "delivery" implies that SOMEONE
ELSE is bringing the baby to the mother-- not that the mother is
*birthing* the baby.

I think our entire culture is geared to separate moms & babies.  I'm
not sure why, though, but I could speculate-- probably it's the
culture of the self that we seem to be obesessed with.

Teresa G. in NC

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