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From:
Aileen Emerling <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Wed, 19 Jun 2002 06:17:17 +0900
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Hi Kathleen and All,

I don't think there is an excuse.

I think there are people who don't know (or care) how important
breastfeeding is. If it doesn't "really matter" if mothers succeed or
not- after all they can  bottle feed- then why make the time or provide
money on education? Breastfeeding doesn't have sales representatives
pushing for it.

When I read about the biochemistry and the immunological significance,
how anyone can not see it as valuable or making a difference eludes
me....Though maybe that's the point.
Not enough people are educated.

I think that there are some people who are trying to be supportive of
breastfeeding, but may rely too readily and too heavily on the "tools"
that are out there (which certainly have a time and a place to be used)
instead of focusing on what's happening with the dyad. It takes a lot of
time to really look at what's happening. And it's a subtle art to even
begin to try to understand all the variables involved between mother and
baby and what might need to be changed in order to make things go more
smoothly.

Maybe it's a comfort for some people to say-Yes I support breastfeeding,
you are having a problem, here's all the paraphernalia you need to make
it work. Look now we tried everything, so if you fail- well neither of
us can feel that bad because hey- we tried everything known to man.

Maybe for some it is easier to do that, then to really sit down and try
to assess the problem, design a plan, implement it (and teach mother how
to implement the suggestions) and continue to evaluate the plan and
modify as needed.

I have given presentations where I try to make the point that- Each Dyad
Is Unique.
But many would prefer a cookie cutter approach Sore nipple do X Won't
latch do Y. And then when the one solution fits all doesn't work, let's
bring in technology. And why doesn't it  work? Because, unfortunately
the beginning point- "looking at each pair as an individual"- is missed.
Look at and "assess the problem"- is missed. "Know the tools- and how to
use them", is only peripherally understood at best.

Do you remember the recent BMJ editorial on "Shame"? (Vol 324 16th
March)

I don't know. I try to remind myself that- it is unfair to generalize,
because I don't know the motives and thoughts behind why person X (fill
in the title) said or suggested mom to do this. And when I generalize,
then I am committing the same error of not treating each person as an
individual.

I am in the middle of a situation with my 6 yr old son where I need to
be his advocate. I have had to stay in hospital and I have had a steep
learning curve. I have found people who feel it is easier to say- the
problem is X, instead of really looking and considering and ruling out
possibilities. I have met people who think it is not my place as a
mother to be doing research and asking difficult questions.

So my point- Sometimes things really stink. That is when we need to
remain above the line, professional, and more then anything- support one
another (and sometimes what more can we do, than listen). All of us are
better than any of us.

Sorry for such a long post.
Aileen Emerling
IBCLC Tokyo Japan

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