Charge more for your services. I'm sorry, people may be grateful but they don't value what they don't pay for. I guess I'm a cynic. Your time is valuable, your knowledge is valuable. When lactation consultants realize they have something of value to offer and quit being subsidized so that folks see their value, we might be respected. I think we have a Pollyanna view of human nature. You value what you invest in. This mom doesn't really value you or your knowledge or your time or else she would listen to you. Wipe the dust off your feet and go elsewhere.
-----Original Message-----
From: Lactation Information and Discussion [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Henya Kazatchkov
Sent: Tuesday, August 06, 2013 4:32 PM
Subject: So, at what point do we give up...
I have been thinking about this a lot.
At what point do we give up.
And stop thinking about these cases.
Case in point - a first time Mom, I was called in by her friend. Day 7.
Baby fully breastfed, but small. And beginning to get lively, nursing every two hours. Nursing like a champ. Main problem seemed to be that Mom was too tired and very unsure of herself, mainly worried about baby getting enough milk. Nice mustard-like stool, all in all no big problems. I reassured Mom, spoke to Dad,both seemed intelligent and said they wanted to breastfeed only. And her Mom is coming to help tomorrow.
OK.
Next day, I come, as arranged and no one is home. I called her cell. She is in the hospital with the baby! Apparently she went to get the baby weight to the clinic and becouse she was so nervous the nurse told them to go to the hospital and get the baby checked. I spoke to her, trying to calm her, then, when I realized that she is determined to stay in the hospital advised her on pumping often and nursing as much as possible. I should have saved my breath! And money (I payed for the calls).
It later came out that the hospital protocol was 60 ml every 3 hours with no breastfeeding between feeds. Since she could not really pump, it was formula. The baby spend 9 days in the hospital, being pocked and probed, and yes, they did a spinal tap, just in case. At some point I told her that I can not help her, since what I recommend does not agree with the doctors orders or their own wishes. At the end baby was declared perfectly healthy.
At that point I did not charge her anything! Her friend reimbursed me for taxi, since walking is so hard for me.
Two days after she got out of the hospital She called me and told me how much she wanted to breastfeed, and promised to do all I say.
Well... I told her she will have to pay me 25 shekels an hour, so I could pay a sitter for my kids. This is less than $8! No problem. OK, first consult went wonderful. Baby ate, some nipple confusion, but not much.
And, miraculously Mom has lots of milk.
Baby got fed, droped off to sleep, we brainstormed trying to solve her problems. Mom and husband with her all day. But they got to sleep too. So we talked about setting up a "nursing station" with a few comfy pillows, eReader and lots of water, so she would not need to get up. Figured the best time for Grandma to take the baby out for a walk and so on. Fed baby again, this time with a nursing pillow, all were happy. Main thing we agreed - no bottles.
Next day I called before coming. She says she just gave baby her bottle.
Why? She just was not going to sleep... She is so sorry...
Can I please come tomorrow?
OK, we made arrangements for 9 AM. I got there at 9.15. By that time the baby was fed a bottle. 100ml. On top of nursing. Stomach was huge and baby in obvious pain.
I massaged the baby, got her to poop, changed diaper and put her to sleep.
Then I walked out.
I felt that I just could not do anything more there.
--
Henya
Migdal HaEmek, Israel
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