Here's a copy of the netiquette lesson (MAP07) from the ROADMAP96
course.  I am forwarding it from the SUB-ARCH list, so I apologize for
cross-posting.
 
 
 
>
>Author:  Patrick Douglas Crispen <[log in to unmask]> at INTERNET
>Date:    8/16/96 9:38 AM
>
>
>MAP07: NETIQUETTE
>
>            "When thou enter a city abide by its customs."
>                            -- The Talmud
>
>
>The Internet is made up of more than computers and commands.  All
>of the computers and commands would be useless if it were not for the
>people who use them.  The commands are neat but it is the PEOPLE >who make
the Internet what it is.  The problem is that every grouping of >people
develops its own culture and common rules that govern the >behavior of the
people.
>
>Today's lesson is going to give you an insider's look at how to avoid >some
of the mistakes that EVERYONE makes when they start out on the >Internet. If
you can take what is said in this lesson to heart, you are going >to find
that your travels on the Information Superhighway will be a whole >lot smoother.
>
>The following "Netiquette" guide (netiquette is the common way to >describe
the etiquette of the Internet) was written by my father, the Rev. >Bob
"Bob"Crispen.  I think you will soon see where my sense of humor >comes from. :)
>
>In fact, it was because of my dad that I first got onto the Internet.  I
>got an e-mail account so that I could e-mail him and ask him for money.
>
>-----
>
>                           NETIQUETTE
>                  by the Rev. Bob "Bob" Crispen
>                    (Patrick Crispen's daddy)
>
>One of these days you're going to get tired of Web surfing or listening in
>on LISTSERVs, IRCs, Usenet newsgroups or whatever, and you're going >to
want to say something yourself.  At that moment your life will change.
>Let's see if we can't make that a change for the better.
>
>EVANGELISM:
>
>Everyone is tempted from time to time to evangelize, to stride boldly into
>the enemy's camp and throw down the gauntlet.  We will never see the >end
of people who pop up on "comp.sys.intel" praising Macs and >Amigas; who send
mail to the SKEPTIC list that flying saucers really, truly >do exist; who
enlighten the Buddhist newsgroups that they're all bound >for hell, and on
and on.
>
>In the entire history of the Net, no one has managed to do this without
>looking like a complete idiot.  If you believe you are the one person who
>will succeed where millions have failed, then you're ready to learn about
>...
>
>FLAMES:
>
>There is nothing you can say that won't offend somebody:
>
>     >It's a bright, sunny day today.
>
>     You filthy *@!?$, what have you got against Seattle?
>
>Flames (violent verbal expressions of disapproval), misunderstandings,
>overreactions, and hurt feelings are par for the course.  Four lessons
>from experience:
>
>(1) HEDGE YOUR BETS.  Rather than saying, "Metal rules! Death to all
>    that appose [sic]!!" try saying "In my humble opinion (often
>    abbreviated IMHO) metal bands perfectly express my feelings,
>    choices, and lifestyle.  Your mileage may vary" (another net
>    cliche', less frequently abbreviated YMMV). By the way, BTW is
>    another frequent net abbreviation, for what it's worth (FWIW). Watch
>    the abbreviations until you're sure of them, or you may have your
>    readers ROTFL (rolling on the floor, laughing).
>
>(2) APOLOGIZE.  When misunderstanding is the culprit, and especially
>    if you respect the person who misunderstood, take the blame on
>    yourself for being unclear, apologize, say what you meant more
>    clearly (if appropriate) and put it behind you.  As in real life
>    (remember that?) people who are quick to anger are often equally
>    quick to forgive.
>
>(3) AVOID FLAME BAIT (conduct which gravely offends the norms, mores
>    and folkways of a particular group).  "Now wait a minute!" you
>    say.  "Do you mean that something that's accepted behavior on one
>    list or newsgroup will draw dozens of stinging, ridiculing
>    comments in another?" I sure do.  Think about it.  Do you expect
>    the people who post on "comp.lang.ada" (about the Ada programming
>    language) to be anything like the people who post to
>    "rec.pets.cats?"
>
>    What can you do?  Lurk a while before you post.  Read what's said
>    like an anthropologist, trying to discover what the big "don't"s
>    are.  The beginning of a school term is a wonderful time to do
>    this, as you will observe the clueless newbies, who weren't smart
>    enough to read this paragraph, being torn to shreds.  There are
>    some things you should NEVER do, and we'll list them in a minute,
>    but let's get to the last bit of advice.
>
>(4) Bow down to the group's gods.  In every Usenet newsgroup and
>    LISTSERV mailing list there are old, gray heads who have earned
>    the respect of everyone in the group.  For example, amongst the
>    subscribers to the list discussing the late American bandleader
>    Stan Kenton are the producer of a Kenton box set and the authors
>    of definitive Kenton biographies and discographies.  You are
>    entirely ignorant compared to those people.  Never pretend you're
>    anything else.  They would dearly love to help you -- to answer a
>    question, help you find a rare record -- but you'll always come
>    out second best in a head-butting contest with them.
>
>    Still other group members have earned their status through long
>    service. Friendships have developed over many years, and marriage
>    is not unknown.  By commenting abusively to or about one of these
>    gods, you'll earn not only her enmity, but the enmity of all of
>    her friends -- which may be everyone in the group but you!
>
>DO'S AND DON'TS (or how to avoid most flames):
>
>(1) DON'T include the entire contents of a previous posting in your
>    reply.
>
>(1) DO cut mercilessly. Leave just enough to indicate what you're
>    responding to.  NEVER include mail headers except maybe the
>    "From:" line.  If you can't figure out how to delete lines in your
>    mailer software, paraphrase or type the quoted material in.
>
>
>(2) DON'T reply to a point in a posting without quoting or
>    paraphrasing what you're responding to and who said it.  Reason: a
>    dozen postings may occur between the original message and your
>    reply.  At some sites your reply may arrive before the original
>    does.
>
>(2) DO quote (briefly) or paraphrase. If the original "Subject:" line
>    was "Big dogs" make sure yours says "Re: Big dogs". Some reply
>    functions do this automatically.  By net convention, included
>    (quoted) lines are preceded by ">" (greater-than signs).  Some
>    mail editors and newsreaders do this automatically.  Others
>    require you to do it manually or to set the "indent character" to
>    ">."  Microsoft Exchange is the hardest to use if you want to
>    correspond on the Internet.  Unless you're a Word expert, you'll
>    have to enter the ">" signs by hand and get rid of the mail header
>    and indentations.  Some versions of Exchange client put the cursor
>    for your reply *before* the message you're replying to; how
>    useless!  Move the cursor so that your readers will see the
>    message you're responding to first, then your response.
>
>
>(3) DON'T send a message saying, "Why doesn't anybody say anything
>    about X?" or "Who wants to talk about X?"
>
>(3) It's always a risk to start a new topic (often called a thread).
>    The group may have just finished a long, bitter war about that
>    very subject.  But if you want to take the risk, SAY SOMETHING
>    yourself about the subject you're raising.
>
>
>(4) DON'T send lines longer than 70 characters.  This is a kindness
>    to folks with terminal-based mail editors or newsreaders.  Some
>    mail and news gateways truncate extra characters, turning your
>    deathless prose into gibberish.
>
>(4) Some mail and news editors only SEEM to insert line breaks for
>    you but actually don't, so that every paragraph is one immense
>    line.  Learn what your mail and news editors do by mailing a
>    message to yourself (or posting it to alt.test) and reading the
>    message in a couple of mail and news readers.  Unix mail or Mail
>    (they're different) and nn and Netscape Navigator's mail and news
>    readers will usually let you read your message in a plain, vanilla
>    form, the way others will see it.
>
>
>(5) DON'T SEND A MESSAGE IN ALL CAPS.  CAPITALIZED MESSAGES ARE HARDER
>    TO READ THAN LOWER CASE OR MIXED CASE.
>
>(5) DO use normal capitalization.  Separate your paragraphs with
>    blank lines.  Make your message inviting to your potential
>    readers.
>
>
>(6) DON'T betray confidences. It's all too easy to quote a personal
>    message by mistake in a message to the entire group.
>
>(6) DO read the "To:" and "Cc:" lines in your message before you send
>    it.  Are you SURE you want the message to go there?
>
>
>(7) DON'T make statements which can be interpreted as official
>    positions of your organization or offers to do business. Saying
>    "Boy, I'd sure like to have one of those new supercomputers" could
>    result in a truck at your loading dock and a bill in the mail even
>    larger than your student loan.
>
>(7) DO treat every post as though you were sending a copy to your
>    boss, your minister, and your worst enemy.  I customarily end
>    every message I send from work with "Speaking for myself, not my
>    company."
>
>
>(8) DON'T rely on the ability of your readers to tell the difference
>    between serious statements and satire or sarcasm.  It's hard to
>    write funny.  It's even harder to write satire.
>
>(8) DO remember that no one can hear your tone of voice.  Use
>    emoticons (or smileys) like :-) or ;^)  -- tilt your head
>    counterclockwise to see the smile.  You can also use caps for
>    emphasis or use net conventions for italics and underlines as in:
>    You said the guitar solo on "Comfortably Numb" from Pink Floyd's
>    _The Wall_ was *lame*? Are you OUT OF YOUR MIND???!!!
>
>    Some mail editors (Exchange again) let you insert all kinds of
>    special characters and put your text in boldface, italics or
>    different fonts.  Don't give in to the temptation to use those
>    features unless you're certain that everyone whom you intend to
>    read your message has the same editor.
>
>
>(9) DON'T put a huge signature at the bottom of your messages.
>
>(9) DO exercise some restraint.  Remember that a large number of mail
>    and news readers out there are set up to use proportional fonts,
>    and your lovely ASCII art will look nothing like you intended it
>    to on those readers.  Remember also that there's a Usenet
>    newsgroup(2) out there whose sole function is to make fun of
>    people's signatures.  Try not to appear there.
>
>
>(10) DON'T send a message that says nothing but "Me, too."  This is
>     most annoying when combined with (1) or (2) above.  Ditto for "I
>     don't know."
>
>(10) DO recall that you aren't obligated to reply to every single
>     thing you read.  Remember the immortal words of Martin Farquhar
>     Tupper (1810-1889): "Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than
>     speech."
>
>
>A word to people living in the United States: the net is international.  If
>you tell a Belgian she's being un-American, SHE ISN'T OFFENDED.  OF >COURSE
she's un-American; you're un-Belgian.  She doesn't care about >being
lectured on the First Amendment and American values.  She >doesn't HAVE a
First Amendment, and she thinks Belgian values are >BETTER.  We Americans
have made fools of ourselves by forgetting this >everywhere else.  Let's try
to behave a little better on the net.
>
>Finally, many groups have had the sense to write down some of their >norms
and folkways in a frequently asked questions (FAQ) list along with >(what
else?) the answers to frequently asked questions.  Many Usenet >FAQs are
posted monthly or so on the news.answers (alt.answers, >comp.answers)
newsgroups.  Listowners of LISTSERVs are often quite >willing to mail you
the FAQ for the list.  In fact, they may have already told >you where it is
in the letter you get welcoming you to the list.
>
>With all we've said above, and with all the help newsgroup moderators >and
listowners are providing to newcomers, it almost seems like you'd >have to
work at it to go charging in with your mouth open and your eyes >and ears
shut, thereby aggravating and alienating some otherwise >perfectly nice
people.  The good Lord gave us two eyes and two ears and >one mouth to
remind us of that very thing.  But then he went and gave us .ten fingers to
type with, and here we are.
>
>-----
>
>
>   (\__/)  .~    ~. ))
>   /O O  ./      .'             Patrick Douglas Crispen
>  {O__,   \    {               The University of Alabama
>    / .  . )    \                [log in to unmask]
>    |-| '-' \    }            http://www.ua.edu/~crispen/
>   .(   _(   )_.'
>  '---.~_ _ _&                    Warning: squirrels.
>
>        ROADMAP96: COPYRIGHT 1996 BY PATRICK DOUGLAS CRISPEN.
>
>The views, opinions, and conclusions reached in this lesson are those
>of Patrick Douglas Crispen and not necessarily those of The University
>of Alabama or its officers and trustees.  The content of this lesson
>has not been reviewed or approved by The University of Alabama, and
>the author is solely responsible for its content.
>
>
 
Anita Cohen-Williams
Listowner of HISTARCH, SUB-ARCH, and SPANBORD
Internet Consultant
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"Never wear anything that panics the cat." - P.J. O'Rourke