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At the risk of getting hooted out of the room for recycling some warmed over
humor, here goes another thought exercise related to heat, the How Hot Is
Hell:
A thermodynamics professor had written a take-home exam for his graduate
students. It had one question: "Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof."
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using the Ideal Gas Law
(relating the temperature, pressure, volume, and amount of gas) or some
variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need
to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are
leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will
not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more
than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one
religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell. With birth
and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because the Ideal
Gas Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay
the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two
possibilities.
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me, in no uncertain
terms, by Ms. Therese Banyan during my Freshman year, and take into account the
fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then
(2) cannot be true, and so Hell is exothermic.
The student received the only A.
Robert L. Russell, Ph.D.
Learning Experience Design
(202) 997-5539
[log in to unmask]
Interim Executive Director & Science Advisor, Self-Reliance Foundation
Project Director, Celebra la Ciencia
_www.celebralaciencia.org_ (http://www.celebralaciencia.org/)
(202) 360-4117
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