Dearest friends, When I came into this field about 11 years ago. A woman from those early days, walked into my office and commented with amazement: "Gee, this is a REAL business. From the way my doctor talked I thought you had long ratty hair and sat crossed-legged and bare chested on the floor breastfeeding babies all day!" She was one of my earliest "failures," and is now one of my dearest friends. Her premature twins were a handful. Today, she tells me that she believes it was the attention the NICU nurses placed on the babies increasing intake as a sign of well being that was her undoing. She didn't feel comfortable not knowing how much they were taking. Those two boys turned 11 years old on my birthday. Armed with my new breastfeeding knowledge, I thought I could set the world on fire. Surely, intellegent people would see the logic of it all. I began adding my knowledge to the childbirth classes I was teaching for the local hospital I was quickly knocked down on my preverbal backside. I was fired within a month. (It was a really good income too. About $3000 per month). One of the peds involved in the meeting the decided my fate, felt guilty about they way I was treated. She asked me out to lunch and told me what really happened. The pediatricians got together and demanded that I be "let go" because I wan changing their practice. Then offered me office space. I worked for Dr. Vicki for 18 months struggling all the way. At the same time I ran a construction company for one of my husband's friends--because lactation wasn't paying the bills. When a new HMO hospital opened up, they sought me out and I've been there 7 years. Like all LC's my job has its ups and downs. Days when I get sick of the stupidity and hard-headed attitudes. Then I remind myself what I said when I was fired so many years ago: "I want to change the world--one baby at a time." You see I know that if I can bring one child at a time closer to his mom, help her give him the best start in life, things will change. Well, since the day I was fired things have changed. That same hospital now has 3 LE's on staff and the docs have changed their opinions. Most of the things I fought so hard for are now accepted practice. Why? Because of the efforts of individual LC's. Their positive contacts with moms and babies slowly changed attitudes and the mothers began demanding change. Remember how childbirth was in the 1970's? Dad's who handcuffed themselves to mom--women demanding more humane treatment. In most places the labor arena has changed too. It's been a long *labor* but it ain't over yet! When I work with LC students, I am amazed how many think, LC work will bring them lots of money. They have no idea that a war is still being fought. They fail to realize that they have to roll up their sleeves and dig in. Or some, like me, go in like a *bull in a china shop* and are rudely awakened by reality. Those are the ones who burn out quickly and leave the profession in about 6 months or a year. Sure there are plenty of days (weeks, sometimes) when I wonder why I keep on going. I don't have to, I could retire on disability and leave it all behind. But I know I would miss it: even the failures. You know if I won a lottery--I think I would volunteer my skills somewhere. Even with all its headaches and heartaches, I love what I do--one baby at a time. Marie Davis (in 111 degree) Moreno Valley, CA