We have many mothers and fathers calling or coming to the lactation center who want to get an electric pump so father/grandparent/whoever can bottle feed either for that helper's own needs or for the intent of helping mother get more rest. I always assure them that I will help them do this, and I will, but I am always gently clear that this plan will actually create more "work" for mother. The mother will need to pump whenever infant is bottlefed, maybe more, so that she will maintain her supply and avoid plugged ducts, or worse. Pump parts and bottle parts will need to be kept clean. While father/grandmother usually agree to do this washing, mother generally ends up doing it. So, instead of picking up baby and breastfeeding, there is breast pumping, bottle feeding, pump washing, bottle washing, bottle preparing. And there is always the posibility of nipple confusion. If they still want to pump so dad can bottle feed, I strongly suggest that they wait until 1) baby is gaining very well as evidenced by several weight checks, 2) that there is absolutely no nipple or breast pain, and 3) that it is easy and quick to get baby attached to the breast (none of this on-and-off stuff). Often they will change their minds after feedings are going well. If they want to do it anyway, I help them. After we have done what we can, given our personal and professional resources, to provide current information in an understandable way, it is not up to us what choice someone else makes. It is then our responsibility to help them do what they decide to do or to let them know that whatever-it-is is not a part of our practice and that they will need to be referred to ***** (usually the physician) for assistance. A small example of this type of referral regards which type of commercial baby milk to use. I never, ever make such a recommendation even though I am routinely asked. It is always parent choice or physician recommendation. When asked my typical response is, "I don't recommend a particular brand of commercial baby milk. You will need to call your baby's pediatrician to find out which brand to use. Whatever brand you use, be sure to check the expiration date before you buy it and again before you use it." Is this (pumping so Dad can bottle feed) something that is seen more often in the educated, middle class mothers more than in other groups? Or is it just a result of the complete normalization of bottle feeding in our culture and seen in all groups? Pardee Hinson, MPH, IBCLC (who is sensitive to anything that makes for more work and can't believe what she helps other people do) Charlotte, NC [log in to unmask]