In a message dated 95-09-30 00:04:05 EDT, Karen wrote: >There is a doctor here who tells >moms they must breastfeed. If they choose not to, he then takes them >aside and informs them that they are "bad" mothers. He does not educate >nor does he take personal desire into the picture. I try to encourage >these moms, but find myself frustrated. I tell them that there is no >doubt breast is best (and I discuss the problems with formula feeds), >however I also tell them that enjoying the baby is the most important >issue. Any comments or help? One of our physicians, who really is a good guy but not terribly tactful, sometimes coerces new moms into breastfeeding, then breezes out and writes a consult for me to see them for instruction. It is a delicate situation, isn't it? I try to get a sense of what the mother really feels before I jump in with both feet. I tell the moms who are not just ambivalent but clearly opposed to breastfeeding that I think breastfeeding is wonderful, but if it puts a barrier between mom and baby (i.e., if mom is repulsed by feedings--I don't use those words with the mom, of course), it may not be the right thing for them. As someone posted regarding nausea with BF, what does it do to the bonding process if there's a strong negative association with the baby 10 or 12 times a day? ( If there's the least bit of interest, I encourage them to try BF. If it works for them, great. If not, they at least know they are making a decision based on experience.) Most of the moms decline to put the baby to breast, but last week, a para 2 who bottle fed her first child agreed to "give it a try," (her husband was very enthusiastic about the idea), and, when I did her telephone follow-up three days after discharge, she was doing well. Should I be more directive? I don't know. I guess my feeling is that every baby should have breast milk, but not every mother should BF. >as much as I enjoy Lactnet, I >find it difficult to recommend to nonbreastfeeding advocates. The >stories and chitchat (as in what did your child call breastfeeding?) >only serve to give the opposition to point out how unprofessional and >"radical" we are. Okay, I'm open to the onslaught. Karen Karen, I see Lactnet not only as a vehicle for educating and exchanging information, although that's certainly an important function, but as a badly needed source of support for those of us who don't always find ourselves in agreement with the world at large. I think the few people who have expressed dissatisfaction with the list expected--and wanted--only cold, hard facts, not a sense of community. My dictionary defines camaraderie as "the familiar, buoyant spirit proper to good comrades, characterized esp. by mutual trust and loyalty." For me, that's Lactnet! It's an opportunity, even for those of us who mostly lurk, to trade stories and experiences, network, share inside jokes, and feel secure in the knowledge that we're with kindred spirits. I've been considering printing out posts that might be of interest to the non-zealots :-) at work, putting them in a ring binder, and leaving it in the report room, so that people can browse when and if they want to. Perhaps you could try this with your colleagues? Judy D in WV