This is one of those areas that has a lot of variation depending on the situation. Of course, if mom's could follow our suggestions with only verbal input (or with us demonstrating on ourselves or with dolls, teddy bears etc) it would be ideal. However, sometimes we can't seem to describe what we are suggesting adequately or the mom just can't picture what we're describing. Some people are tactile learners. In these cases, they learn better if we "take them through the motions". I find I rarely handle the breast myself. I can nearly always place the mom's hands where I feel they will work best, then place my hand over hers to guide it. I do at times find I need to shape her breast and aim it for her to show her how to do it. Then I have her do it herself after she's seen what she needs to do. Another situation where I will "take the lead" is when I go in a room and find baby frantically trying to latch and mom very frustrated and "all thumbs". Then I may take the approach of "Let me show you how to latch baby, then I'll explain why I did what I did and you'll be able to try it yourself." If I try to explain to her what to do and baby is wailing, she won't hear what I say. We feel flattered when a mom says "Can I take you home with me?", but when I hear that, I feel like I haven't fully done my job. There are situations when we need to take a hands on approach, but until we transfer that to mom being able to do it herself, we haven't finished the job. Winnie *********************************************** To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest) To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet All commands go to [log in to unmask] The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM) mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to: http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html