In addition to this, I would ask her why her friend suggestion
resonated with her, if it did.
Is she worried about the time she is spending nursing the baby? Is
someone else worried?
Is she worried that he could overfeed? etc.
I would try to help her understand why she is worrying in the first place.
That it is what LLL meetings do, after all!
Warmly
Micaela
Italy
2013/8/9 Ingrid <[log in to unmask]>:
> Lactation support can be frustrating sometimes, Tina - too many cooks is often an issue :) Extra complicated when it's family.
>
> I would encourage you to put this mom in touch with her local LLL http://www.llli.org/webus.html
>
> La Leche League Leaders see 'worried mom syndrome' a lot, and spending time with other nursing moms provides an amazing boost of confidence and support. I highly recommend it for EVERY pregnant woman.
>
> I often ask moms (gently) who knows when they (the mom) is hungry. When it occurs to them that only they know when they are hungry, that can be an aha moment about following a baby's cues.
>
> You could also remind her that every time her baby wants to nurse, it's basically 'supplementation' (with the good stuff), helping her baby to get lots of milk and grow well. It's totally okay to offer the breast whenever baby is sucking on his hands - if he doesn't want to nurse, he'll say so.
>
> Good luck!
>
> Ingrid
>
> Ingrid Tilstra
> La Leche League Canada Leader
> International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Lactation Information and Discussion [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Tina Schallhorn
> Sent: Friday, August 09, 2013 6:53 AM
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Worried mother
>
> Ladies, allow me to pick your brain on how to go about this. I have permission to post. My husband's cousin, first time mom, unfortunately had a hard time getting a good latch in the first week of her baby's life. As a result, her supply was delayed a bit. Although there really was no need to totally freak out about the 10% weight loss he experienced (he was born full term, and never plotted below the 50th%), her doctor encouraged her to supplement with formula - Eeeek. About a week after she started supplementing, she contacted me about the fact that she was really wanting to exclusively breastfeed and wanted my opinion on the supplementation. As a good pediatric dietitian, I gathered all the growth, weight loss, birth and feeding information and did an evaluation for her. I also had her immediately contact the lactation support from the hospital she gave birth at (she is across the country from me and at that time I had not even met the little one yet). After she saw lactation I told her that based on my eval and the fact that she was now working successfully on the latch (and she was much more comfortable with him at breast), I did not think supplementing was needed. Really, this is a baby who was showing all signs of catching up to lost time at that point and mom was pumping to increase supply too. She talked to her husband, who very politely asked us both to just follow doctor orders at this time. It took us a few weeks chatting until she finally transitioned him fully back to breast. A couple of weeks ago at a family reunion I finally met the little one - chubby cheeks and all, fully breastfeeding. We chatted a lot that weekend and I talked to her about the "worried mother syndrome" that can happen with mom's who experienced some issues initially. I talked to her about the division of responsibility in feeding and to educate herself when the time came about how children's feeding changes as they move up in the development stages, especially into toddler years. Basically I gave her the talk on "you decide the what, he decides the how much and when" for now. As he grows he will continue to chose the how much and whether or not he wants to eat - and as a toddler, sometimes he won't (you have no idea how many toddler parents I see in my office crossing the division of responsibility and force feeding their toddlers because they were traumatized by early feeding issues!) Anyway, all was fine until yesterday when I got this email from her:
>
> "Have some questions for you. Eli turned 15 weeks this week. How much and how often should I be feeding him? For the last month I have been feeding him every 2 to 2 1/2 hours during the day. Sometimes it takes him a hour to eat. He is still sleeping thru the night. One of my friends suggested trying to stretch out his feedings so he isn't cluster feeding all the time. He loves to suck his hands all the time so don't know if I am mistaking this for hunger. I just worry about him getting enough. Especially since I had problems with milk supply. How do I know if he is going to need to cluster feed? His next appointment isn't for a couple of weeks. I did try today feeding him every 3 hours. He did fuss a little bit and seemed to be doing ok. "
>
> How would you put your response in a simple, clear and easy for her to make sense of manner? I am fairly new to lactation and babies I see mostly are newborns at the hospital before they go home. I just want to help her relax, that she is doing alright and that babies will do what babies will do! But it seems all we talked about in the past went straight through her head!
>
> Thanks ladies - your years and years of experience on this is strongly appreciated!
>
> Tina Schallhorn, RD, LDN, CLC, soon to be first time mom.
> [log in to unmask]
> Peoria Illinois USA
>
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