Amy,

You wrote, "What do you say?  Most LC's probably don't encounter this, but I
have to keep being their doc.  I feel so disappointed!"

Yes, it is discouraging and sad for babies' and moms' sake when moms wean
prematurely.  And LC's do encounter this and have to deal with our own feelings
before, or as,  we speak to mom; I understand that you continue to see these
moms and babes as their doc, however, and unless one sees mom in a support group
setting, as LC's it usually is a one time encounter to deal with weaning; it
still isn't easy.

Giving these moms congrats as you did for breastfeeding as long as they did
is helpful for one never knows if that mom will breastfeed her next baby
because she felt accepted the first time.  It might be beneficial at some point to
ask these moms what influenced their decision to wean.  You could open the
conversation with something like, "Breastfeeding is not easy when one doesn't get
support and encouragement from ones husband/family/society/friends..."  One
never knows what mom may be going through at home or what kind of pressures
she's under to wean.  Acknowledging good things about her mothering, teaching her
how to bottle feed correctly, knowing you are not responsible for her decision
to wean, all can help smooth the road for ongoing trusting relationship.

And the bottom line is for us, who so want to help moms succeed with
breastfeeding, it is often a blow to us as we wonder what might have gone wrong on our
part.  I always find it helps me to do a little "case autopsy" and review
what I did and said, so if I come up with something I could have said or done
differently, I try not to do that again.  We do what we can and some days are
better than others.  Perhaps, just expressing how you feel and knowing others
feel the same can help; your post helped me.

Barbara Latterner, BSN, RN, IBCLC, RLC
Brewster, NY




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