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Subject:
From:
Pam MazzellaDiBosco <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Fri, 20 Apr 2007 11:48:15 -0400
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Nursing in public is such a hot topic these days and I still do not
understand why.  I can drive my son to school and on a billboard at his
middle school exit is a near naked female advertising a 'gentleman's club'.
I can watch television and even during 'family' hours of viewing see
advertisements with near naked females selling everything from perfume to
bras.  The idea is not that no one wants to see a  breast! Heavens no,
everyone wants to see breasts!  What they do not want to see is a reminder
that breasts have a function that is beyond their sexuality.  No one wants
to be reminded that breasts are for babes and not to sell products.  I do
not think it is breastfeeding and the idea of the age of the child, the
thought of skin showing or that we may have to tell our children that babies
drink milk from mommies.  I think people cringe when they see a baby on
breast because it reminds them that the ads, the billboards, the titillating
sales promotion is really about baby food.  And, well, heck, that just takes
the joy out of naked breasts.  My poor sons have already seen more breasts
live and in person then most boys their age just because of what I do and
where they have been and now they just don't think breasts are all that
mysterious and see no purpose in oogling at women's bosoms.  Poor dears have
been denied the opportunity to find breasts something strange and special to
seek to touch inside a young girls shirt. Instead my 19 year old son asked
me if his girlfriend's breasts are too far spaced and too small to be able
to make milk because he of course expects function as well as form.

No mother should have to announce "excuse me, I am going to breastfeed now"
or ask "is it okay with you if I nurse?" unless we are now going to demand
that every mother who whips at her bottle just anywhere she pleases whenever
she thinks she should has to do the same thing.  And, you know, she really
should be careful about just letting her child carry it around showing to
everyone with no discreteness.  Bottles after all can be so offensive to
young children who grew up seeing only breastfeeding. I still remember my
daughter's concern when she saw a woman use a bottle to feed her
baby..."MOM!  What is she doing!!!???  Why is her baby not eating right?"  I
had to explain to her that not all women use their breasts to feed babies,
and some use bottles.  I told her some women wanted to breastfeed, but had
problems and so this was how some women had to feed their babies. In her
innocence she did not need to know that some women just do not choose to
breastfeed.  I told her not to stare it was not nice to make the mom feel
bad because she had to use a bottle.  She was so shocked to learn this
because her life experience was women and babies and breasts.  It's one
thing when we ask "is it okay with you if I smoke?" because second hand
smoke carries risks, but what risk does a breastfeeding baby or child carry
to those around? None.  Just a new experience of what is sadly lacking in
our USA culture today--the visual of breasts being used appropriately!

I have seen many women breastfeeding in public, and I have yet to see one
with her shirt off and both breasts out. Ooops, wait, I take that back.
There was this one woman who attended our support group meeting and did just
that.  We were shocked because it was a couples meeting, and yes, we did ask
her to keep her shirt on. But, we expected the men to keep their shirts on
too, so it did not seem too much to ask.  So, that's one mom in 20 years.
For most part women tend to try to cover some skin when breastfeeding out of
their homes.  Personally, I try to cover the roll of fat that hangs over my
jeans, but you are welcome to notice my breast if you get close enough.  I
nurse discreetly, but the discreet part is for my waist not my chest!

Take care,
Pam MazzellaDiBosco, IBCLC, RLC
FL, USA

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