Phyllis notes:

<< I have met a number of clients who interpret this nonnurtitive sucking or
 'hanging out' to be 'just pacifying himself on me'.  You can almost see her
 internal shudder as she expresses her distaste for this behavior, as though
 it were unnatural, abnormal, or aberrant.  She wants him OFF.  Feed and be
 done with it!  Another mom described nursing as "he's eating on me".  It
 seems to be a body image thing, or some difficulty with intimacy. I could
 use some comments and suggestions from those well-versed in psychology on
 how to assist these moms thru their obvious discomfort with normal body
 functions and feelings. >>

I think the above statements are ones that push my emotional buttons.  I see
the same thing you do -- that moms are worried that the baby is doing more
than just "eating."  And the nurses and the grandmas and all the rest are
quick to tell a new mom, "Don't, whatever you do, allow him to use you as a
pacifier."   It's the idea that the baby, somehow, can USE the mother for
some nefarious purpose.  So I talk to them about the difference between an
old rubber thing stuck in the baby's mouth and the baby shoved over in a
corner someplace and being snuggled up to mom, interacting with her, getting
the occasional trickle of warm sweet milk, listening to her heartbeat,
smelling her smells, and overall being "at home" in her arms.  they usually
get the picture -- even if they'd rather have their baby in the corner with
an old rubber thing in his mouth.  And how many of the nurses are guilty of
shoving a pacifier in the baby's mouth in the nursery rather than bringing
him to mom.  What frosts me is that they don't even ASK the mom about it --
they just DO it.  Using a pacifier needs to be an informed decision that the
PARENTS make, not the nurses.  ARGHHHHHHH.

I also tell them there is nothing wrong with using a pacifier occasionally
when they are driving down the Eisenhower expressway at rush hour in Chicago
and baby is screaming.  On the other hand, I warn them that pacifiers are
addicting for parents.  Most mothers don't intend to get addicted, but they
do -- can't bear to see their sweet baby without that little cute
plastic/rubber thing in his mouth.

The only good thing that has happened lately is that I haven't seen any
vanilla scented pacifiers recently.  Perhaps we made an impact there.

Or perhaps they were just too expensive to make.

Jan B.  (In Wheaton where we finally turned on the heat last night).