I have been helping mothers who choose to nurse their babies for over
twenty years.  In the course of pre-natal classes I have often met
women who will "try " to nurse their children  and I feel that is a
very normal response from someone with limited exposure to
breastfeeding role models, limitless exposure to a "bottle-feeding "
culture  and not much confidence in the power of their own bodies.

I have also come across a few mothers who do not wish to nurse their
infants.  They may know all the health reasons why it would benefit their
children as well as themselves, they know all the economic and
convenience reasons, they may even have very supportive partners who are
encouraging breastfeeding.   Yet they choose to use a  substitute for
themselves.

I do not know why this happens.  There have been anecdotal stories about
psychological difficulties related to previous sexual abuse, there may
be women who find such close, continuous bodily contact disgusting to
them.

I cannot judge these women-- I would prefer them to be good mothers,
loving and enjoying their children rather than distressed unhappy
mothers feeding their children at their breasts and hating it ( and
perhaps hating their children into the bargain.)

None of us knows everything that is involved in another person's
choices---we can provide support, information, practical assistance, but
in the end, each
woman must do what she deems best for her children, her family and
herself.

Eileen Shea, BSc, IBCLC