Lisa,

I think for some of these moms the stress of pumping, feeding and also
trying to put baby to the breast becomes very difficult.  

Please let this mom know there are options that may not meet all her
definition of breastfeeding, but which some moms have found was what they
could handle.

One mom I knew chose to breast-milk feed.  She could not handle the stress
and the feelings of rejection she felt when the baby came to the breast
then cried not being able to feed at the speed he wanted to.  So this mom
pumped her milk and fed it - at first with a regular nipple and later on
with a Haberman.  

I called her one of my "heroes" - she worked, pumped, and kept her baby on
exclusive breast-milk feeding for over 6 months.  After that, she continued
pumping and breast-milk  feeding for over a year.  This child NEVER had an
ear infection.  We discussed what a great gift she was giving her baby. 
Due to other physical complications, the repairs were delayed, but this
baby was very healthy and happy.

At times we make moms feel that if they can't put the baby to the breast it
is not breastfeeding - if she can't breastfeed without "equipment" such as
SNS or Nipple Shields, she is not doing "enough" for her baby.  Our goals
are always the "ideal" of mom breastfeeding baby "au naturel".  However,
this is not always possible - not only due to medical or physical problems
but due to psychosocial situations.  

Each mom has her level of tolerance for stress and it is up to us to be
ever conscious of where she is and help her cope, not giving her our goals
but giving her options and helping her identify her own goals.  Then we
help her to reach them - and perhaps once she does, new goals can be
identified - or maybe that's it.  She's done a great job.  Her baby has
received much more than many babies in the US...  And she has learned and
so have we.


Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, IBCLC, LLLL
Vacaville, CA
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