I was so glad to see that statement about many "primary attachments" in other
cultures.  In my home, my husband was never a "mother substitute", as I was at
home.  But he did have a very close attachment to our babies - not just when
they were older, but as babies.  I also had a mom who often stayed with us for
months at a time - especially during the holidays and when situations arose such
as surgery or just because she was lonely in her home in PR when I was busily
taking care of three children under 4.  She'd come give me a hand - never as a
"mother substitute," but as another "primary attachment".
When another neighbor ( and LLL mom) applied for leadership after leaving her
son for 3 days (at age 2 - he was weaned over 6 months), she was denied because
she left her son with the Grandfather who lived in the home with them.  She was
told "children suffer from separation even if they don't show it..." They stated
she just wasn't "aware" of how much her child needed her!  To this day this
young adult (16 now) is exceedingly close to his grandfather and spends every
Holiday he can with him in his farm.   I was furious, but unable to get the
decision reconsidered.  To this day we have a "not very happy with LLLI" person
who could have been one of our strongest advocates.  I understand things are
more "culturally sensitive" , but we also have to be aware that even in the US
we have different "Cultures".
Jeanette Panchula, BSW, LLLL, RN, IBCLC - Puerto Rico
Just got back from the beach, LactNetters!