Heather that is a big BUT!

I don't believe I am 'fudging' anything, nor did I say it to make people feel better. My post was in reply to a comment about 'correct  language'. OMS has a very wide definition of breastfeeding and I agree with them.

Heather, why is there a but? They are breastfeeding, period. You, yourself, warn against categorising. 

I have not said anywhere that at-the-breast-feeding and expressed-milk-feeding are the same - I said that they are both breastfeeding. 

>by this than by a pretence that what they are doing is 'the 
> same' and that the difference doesn't matter.

I was quite offended by that - I did not say it. If this comes across in my post, then please point out where and I shall edit. 

>their equally 
> wonderful gift is their *presence* at the time of the feeding. 
> Breastmilk feeding needs to be done *as if the mother was 
> breastfeeding direct* when possible.

This comment makes me think  you do not know the reality of exclusive or predominant pumping - on facebook there is a photo going around of a baby in a rocker being bottle fed by a mother who is also pumping. I have been there and done that and was not proud of it - but there are only 24 hours in a day, especially if you have other children - this is often the reality of expressing. There may be some EPers who are so efficent they can fill a chest freezer (and they are obviously the ones who talk about it loudly, not the ones who struggle to make enough to be one bottle ahead, or who never make cover their child's nutritional needs and supplement. I don't know how many times  I was a 'wonderful presence' - rarely I would think. My husband and I were both sleepless zombies in the early months, I would pump and pass the bottle to him and he would feed the baby - every couple of hours. I only mention my personal experience as it's something parents are reticent to talk about. It is painful to know that you were NOT a wonderful presence who bonded through bottle feeding. It is painful to know that expressed milk is not nutritionally equivalent to breastmilk fresh from the breast (parents do seem to know this Heather, I have not yet encountered a parent where I have had to point that out). 

Parents who pump are between a rock and a hard place. The rock is knowing that breast-milk-feeding doesn't measure up to at-the-breast-feeding. The hard place is being told that donor milk is risky (a common perception), and that formula is a poor alternative (akin to poison - a common perception). 

Heather, my aim is not to make someone feel better. My aim is to get parents talking about their experience - bring the breast-milk-feeders into the breastfeeding domain (where they belong), get them to tell their stories, share their realities, and figure out how to improve their breastfeeding efforts and experience. 

Having parents who feel alone, excluded and crying into their pumps (I am not exaggerating) because they feel like failures, is not a good outcome. Parents proud to be pumping would be a good outcome. Finding out how these parents got started on pumping would be an even better outcome. We have to work out where the system has failed - in Thailand, babies with CLP are breastfeeding. On EP forums, there are parents who gave up because of undiagnosed TT. These parents need competent support. I can't give them the support, I am not yet an IBCLC - but I can listen and give them a voice and part of that is describing their experience with inclusive language. 

Breast milk feeding v breastfeeding is not inclusive, in my mind. Currently, I use; 

Breastfeeding, umbrella term (as defined by OMS)
followed by the subcategories; 

at-the-breast-feeding and expressed-milk-feeding - for those times when we need to know the details.
Look forward to hearing thoughts on that.

Alice Farrow
www.cleftlipandpalatebreastfeeding.com
www.languageofinclusion.com






 		 	   		  
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