I saw the show on Oprah last week, and even taped it.  My first impression was good, because no one said *What* is that mom doing nursing a three year old.  Then I started discussing it with another mom, and watched it again.  The " " 's are my recollections of the dialog and used for clarity, not my typing script from the tape.

Scenerio was a 3 YO nursiing 12X/day & who's mother was frustrated with BF because the child had gotten so demanding about nursing.  The child would start throwing herself at her mother and scream "Nurse, nurse".  The mother would tell the child, "No I have to do the laundry".  the child would persist, and then the mom would sigh and say, "Ok, just a little one".  The child was so demanding about nursing that the mother couldn't put her in her carseat when in the car, and the child would nurse everytime they got in the car.  When the mother was actually nursing, the mom told the child that she was tired of nursing and wanted to quit and broke the latch.  The child threw a fit and the mother said "Well OK, just a little one." on the other side.

The experts said that this had become a bad habit and that like any bad habit that to fix it, the mom must stop the behavior cold turkey.  Don't worry about traumitizing the child that children are resilient.  Oprah looked shocked.

Same story for the part on trying to get a three YO to sleep in his own bed.  The child threw a fit and eventually (30 min) the mother let him in her bed.  She said "He always has to sleep on my pillow" with a little smile.  Mom did say that if she let him come in bed, he'd go right to sleep and she could then move him to his own bed with no problem.

The experts did say that many Americans are Co-sleeping and that if it's OK with the parents, that there is nothing wrong with co-sleeping.  But if you don't want to get into that situation, don't let your kids associate going to sleep with your body.  Never lay down with your child to get him to sleep.

The experts did not ever say that this was not a BF or a sleep issue, but a bad habit that the parents had allowed themselves to get into.  They didn't talk about when you say No stick to it.  They never talked about the wonderful steps toward weaning by limiting the length of time or the duration between BF'ings.  Just Cold Turkey!!!  And they never said, if you are going to allow your son to sleep with you every night, why don't you just let him in to bed at first and not have the 30 minutes of screaming first!

I'd write a letter to Oprah, but I really don't think they want these opinions on the show, or they would've had Kathryn Dettwyler give a comment on the BF situation too!!!!  I was looking for her and waiting for her to correct the two Experts!

Dayna Williams
Reno, NV - who is also in the situation of nursing a 3 YO and does realize that "Nurse, Nurse" is a very hard  habit to get out of - from my own experience!