Laurie,
Welcome!  It took my hubby and I a while to figure out how to download, too.
 /since you also have AOL this is how to do it.  Use the Flashsession Located
in the Mail window.  To download and go immediately offline, all you have to
do is select the Activate Flashsession  'thing' and it will automatically
upload any replies you have written and then download all your new mail.
If you really get confused, AOL has Tech help in their member services
section.
Good luck!
Janet
(new to the computer thing too!!)   :)