In a message dated 99-01-09 09:46:16 EST, you write:

<< Dawn says: 'Mom puts baby to breast for around 3 feedings a day.'

 But this is *nowhere near*  frequently enough to build up a supply... It's
 hard, but this mother, IMHO, needs to know that she  really *doesn't have a
 prayer*  of  bf  if she cannot feed more often than this - obviously, we
 don't express it to the mother in quite these bald terms, but giving this
 information in a way that is straight and easily-understood is essential.  >>

Yes, clearly this is not enough to build up to exclusive bf.    And yes, the
mom needs to know that.    But is hte mom talking about exclusive bf?

If what this mother is really saying is, I want for my own reasons to bottle
feed but I'd also like to do some bf mixed in with that, then why not relate
directly to that?   It's a fact that for many mothers -- and Dawn's mom here
seems like one of them -- exclusive bf is not really, truly on their agenda.
Shouldn't we encourage them to nurse as much as they can manage in their own
real lives?   This is true both from the attachment perspective -- as Jack
Newman points out so often and so acutely, bf is more than feeding -- and also
from the immunity perspective, if I am understanding correctly the Torah that
comp-fed babies still get significant immune benefits from whatever bm they
receive.    So while it would be great to work a miracle that would persuade
this mom to throw away her bottles, in real life why not get this mom to make
peace with what she's capable of  and maximize that instead?    It frustrates
me when we let the perfect be the enemy of the good, and since in this case
the choice is probably between only a bit of bf and none at all, I'd say a
little bit has got to be considered the good.

Elisheva Urbas in NYC, trying to keep the mom in mind.