Thanks to all who replied to my previous post.  I'm  going to respond to
all in this post.

Christine: "Why can't mom get a new doctor?  That is her right as a
patient.

I wish, the problem is that the neos work as a group at that hospital,
like in most. It isn't just one of the neos that is ignorant of milk
banks, the entire group is. To get a "new" doc, the babies would have to
be transferred to a new hospital and they aren't stable enough for that
at this time.  Incidentally, we attempted to have the birth mother
deliver at a hospital which is far more "baby friendly" and which has an
excellent reputation for it's NICU.  Unfortunately, the birth mother was
unwilling to accommodate our request (mom's and mine's).  Please don't
fault her for this, she went through an incredible ordeal selflessly and
had her own reasons for choosing to deliver where she did.

Serina: "Denny if I were in this mothers position I would do what she
suggested and beg EBM from friends then tell dr, Look! My milk finally
came in!  I would not hesitate.

Serina, I really do sympathize with this point of view, but it's not as
simple as it seems.  What if donor has Hep C, HIV etc., and doesn't know
it? (Not all husbands are dh!)  Also, the donor would certainly be in a
very bad spot if something were passed to babies, from a legal point of
view (I'm assuming)  Additionally, mom spends all day in NICU and of
course pumps there.  It wouldn't be difficult for staff to see that no
milk was being collected.  Also, I would be very uncomfortable being
part of any subterfuge.  Now, if mom decided to do this in spite of the
risks of using unscreened, unpasturized milk, then that would be up to
her.  I see my responsibility as being to keep her as completely
informed as possible so she can make informed decisions.

Melissa: Does Mom have time for a visit to a lawyer with whom she can
share all the information she's been given?

Actually no.  However, more to the point, she certainly doesn't need to
put herself in an adversarial position with her babies doctors.  I
doubt  anyone could count on a patient getting the best possible care
while threatening their hcp with legal action.  By the way, the family
does have a lawyer because *get this* even though she is the biological
mother of these babies, because they were delivered by a surrogate, she
has to legally ADOPT her own kids!

Kathy: The new Mother's Milk Bank at Austin has an excellent
neonatologist...perhaps you could have this baby's doc talk with this
neo.  If Dr. Rivera can't change your doc's mind, no one can!!

Yes, this is what we have been trying to accomplish because I believe
you are correct, if the neo would be willing to become educated, surely
he would revise his decision.  Dr. Rivera has generously offered to help
in any way he can, including a possible inservice for the neos at this
hospital!  The neo has been provided with a recent study urging the use
of mb in preemies as well as Dr. Rivera's number.  No action on his
part, so far as I am aware this am.

Please, keep the ideas and suggestions coming, this mom, her babies and
I need all the help we can get with this!

--

Denny Rice, RN, IBCLC
Dallas Texas USA

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