>
>
>I wish we could get away from "how often does the baby feed?" (although of
>course I ask that question all the time). I wish we could convey to mothers
>that even though the baby is now outside, they are really still one unit and
>shouldn't be separated and should be attached most of the time mouth to
>breast.
>
>Teresa Pitman


Yes - actually knowing the frequency of the feeds is important when
helping mothers assess what's going on, as a baby who *isn't* feeding
very often is a problem. So....I find it useful to talk in 'open
questions', and say 'tell me about what happens when the baby comes
to the breast' or  if I need specifics, 'can you tell me how many
times you think your baby had a feed from your breasts yesterday?'
and it leads to talking about how you can't always say that 'visits'
to the breasts are actual 'feeds' and how normal this is.

Asking 'how often does the baby feed?' is likely to get something
like 'every 3 to 4 hours' or '8 times a day' because this is what
they have been told 'ought' to happen.

Something else I find helpful is to say to mothers, 'you know, just 2
days/5 days/2 weeks ago (or whatever), your baby was inside you,
feeding as and when he wanted, with no one looking at the clock, and
never having to wait until it's time....so it's not a bit surprising
your baby still sometimes wants to feed that way, as it is familiar
and comfortable to him.'

Heather Welford Neil
NCT bfc, UK

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