Lynn,

I think the most important thing we can do as individuals is meet the mother
where she is.  While I may be quite comfortable sitting with my breast out at
the beach, others will not.  Who am I to decide what modesty means to them?
Just as it is not right to judge that I choose to be discrete only when it
suits me...usually to cover my belly roll, not my breast (haha)...it is also
not right to judge mothers who do feel uncomfortable showing even the
slightest skin.

What I ask when a mom asks me about discreet nursing is ...Do you want to
hide that you are nursing or hide your breast while you nurse?  Sometimes it
is actually the very fact that they are nursing. Which means forget the
blanket routine.  Everyone knows you are nursing then. Haha  But mostly is is
hide the breast.  I can then tell them numerous solutions and it is their
choice which works for them.  I was once at a party in a children' s play
establishment and a mother actually created a tent for herself.  She took out
a sheet, covered herself head to toe with her child in with her to nurse.  I
was shocked.  This was beyond discreet.  But, she believed that it was a
grave sin for a man to look upon her breast, and her child did not like to be
unable to gaze at her. (Oh, yes, you know I did have to ask her!  I also
congratulated her on being such a wonderful and loving mother to have found a
way to nurse that made her feel comfotable. )  She did not mind that she may
look odd to those who were looking...She was as brave as any woman baring her
breast if you ask me.

Sometimes I fear that in our zeal to encourage woman to stand up and demand
their rights, we forget that for some that right is to cover their breast,
cover their head, cover their face,  etc.  While we may or may not think this
is a necessity, it is indeed as much their freedom to choose it as it is ours
to not.

While I too believe that as long as we allow the breast to be sexualized,
this issue will continue, I respect that until it is resolved, many mothers
will not feel comfortable nursing with breast exposed.  So, those of us who
can will just have to pave the way and if nothing else those who can't will
at least know they should go ahead and nurse in public because people will be
so busy gawking at us discreet nursers will go unnoticed!

Best,
Pam MazzellaDiBosco, IBCLC  FL, USA

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