If we "hear" moms correctly, they may be saying different things when they
express the desire to have their baby fed by dad:
        "I am overwhelmed by this job and I want to get some help."
        "Dad isn't showing much interest in our baby, maybe if he fed
him/her, he would be more involved."
        "What would happen if we had an emergency - I need to know my baby
would survive (remember we often have moms with the blues).
        "My family is telling me I'm too involved with the baby and 'need
to get away'"
        
So the first thing we need to do is ask more questions so we can give the
right response.  (I still tell myself - 13 questions before I give an
answer...)

It does not help to just give the usual "dad can give the baby a bath" when
the dad is so afraid of handling the baby that he only holds it when he is
in bed (yes, I had one like that!).

And yes, Dads can certainly be close to their babies even though they have
never given them food - but was that the REAL question?

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, IBCLC, LLLL
Vacaville, CA
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