Thank you Michelle for the kind words below. I would like to remind
everyone, US and foreign, that we are all trying to do our best to help
mothers breastfeed. My comment about łsucking it up˛ is based on the
reality that is faced by those in the military. Those of you who are NOT in
the military can dream about the changes youąd like to see all you want (and
please do). I deal with the mothers who ARE currently serving and have
these restraints and challenges in place already.
In the current military climate, the changes you are asking for simply are
NOT possible (at this time and juncture). Were a mother to take her case to
her Commanding Officer asking for a year off, sheąd be laughed out of the
room. 6 weeks is it folks. Yes, it is barbaric, I fully agree with that
statement. But the last time I checked, the US military was in the business
of fighting wars, not babysitting. Keep in mind that the military is like a
well-oiled machined. Every single person has a specific job to perform to
make it run smoothly. If one person is pulled out because she cannot
perform their duties than someone else has to be pulled from someplace else
to replace her. It is like dominoes as each one affects another down the
line. With 20% of the US military comprised of women and nearly 40% of
those women having children under the age of 5, you can see what a huge
manpower loss that would be for the military. (And I think, perhaps
understand the negative feelings the men in the military might just have at
having to pick up the slack of all the women who are on a year-long
maternity break to stay home with their babies?) As it stands the military
has made some huge strides just within the past few years, by even
acknowledging the need for breastfeeding support and extending the
deployment deferment to 12 months (for the Air Force, Marines and Navy).
That is HUGE. 10 years ago, that was unthinkable.
Lest you all think that I am cold-hearted, I want to make it clear that I am
a La Leche League Leader...and had it not been for LLLL when I was in the
military, I never would have the wonderful 13 YEARS of breastfeeding my
children that I did. LLL made it possible for me to hold tight to my
children, even when I had to deploy and leave them. By pumping and feeding
my BREASTMILK to babies while gone, it allowed me to BREASTFEED them when I
home. Did it go against every fiber of my being to leave? Sure it did, it
was the hardest thing I EVER did. But I managed to serve my country AND
breastfeed my baby. I am positive that my bond would not have been nearly
as strong if I had NOT been breastfeeding.
Over the years the moms I work with have repeatedly told me that
breastfeeding was the one way that they could continue to stay close to
their children, even when they had to be separated all day at work or while
gone on a training or deployment. That breastfeeding made for an
irreplaceable bond that they didnąt have with children that they didnąt
breastfeed, or that they didnąt see in the mothers and babies who never
breastfeed.
Instead of bashing the sacrifices that these mothers make, we should be
applauding them for making it work against some incredible odds. And thatąs
all I am trying to do, support the moms and give them the tools to make the
best of the situation that they are in. Telling them that they shouldnąt
have to leave their baby, or that it is against some Human Rights code or
that they need to go to their Commander and demand to let out of their
duties (which she could, if she wants to face disciplinary action and/or a
hardship discharge) is just pointless. These moms need HELP to make
breastfeeding work in the situation that they are in NOW.
Thank you for listening and I will now return to lurking. I have a book to
finish proofing, so that moms in the military have a resource to turn to as
they struggle to balance breastfeeding and serving their country. As you
can tell, this is a very near and dear topic to my heart!
Sincerely,
Robyn Roche-Paull
BS, IBCLC, LLLL
US Navy Veteran 1991-1997
Author and Founder ~ Breastfeeding in Combat Boots
Visit us at: http://www.breastfeedingincombatboots.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/breastfeedingincombatboots
On 5/28/10 2:43 AM, "LACTNET automatic digest system"
<[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Regarding the harsh words below concerning mothers in the US military, it
> seems like it would be so much more helpful to have a little extra courtesy
> when dealing with cross-cultural situations. When hearing about what happens
> in another country, a little bit of self-restraint in sharing the level of
> your shock and disgust at other customs can go a long way in making this a
> safe forum for all of us who are trying to support mothers and babies the
> best we can in the cultures in which we live.
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