I think the concerns about this case are an example of the hazards of
sexualizing breasts. Would anyone be concerned if this little boy liked to
drink from a baby bottle every couple of weeks? Or if he sucked his thumb? I
have to say I see large numbers of 8-year-olds who suck their thumbs or
fingers, so clearly the desire to suck can still be pretty strong at that
age. But because he's continuing to suckle at his mother's breast - the
natural place to satisfy the need to suck and the natural place to be
comforted - it's seen as sexual, perverted, and possibly abusive.

I don't think I've know a child who was still nursing at 8 but I have
definitely known several still nursing at 6 or 7 (my own weaned by age
five). I doubt that it is common but that certainly doesn't mean it's
abnormal, or a problem that needs intervention.

Certainly when my children were 8, even though they had stopped nursing,
they loved my breasts. They loved to cuddle against them, hold them, pat
them, etc. It wasn't at all sexual - my breasts reminded them of the many
comforting, loving hours they'd spent nursing - happy memories! People need
to understand that breasts mean something different to breastfed children
than they do to adults who have been raised in a bottlefeeding society.

If I had a concern, it would be about the fact that (as I understand it) the
woman had a video done of her son nursing and arranged for or permitted it
to be shown on TV. I think there is potential there to embarrass her son and
set him up for teasing by other children. I understand her motives - her
desire to demonstrate that this is normal and she has nothing to hide - but
I think the consequences for that little boy (who has already been through
the trauma of being placed in foster care) might be serious. If it was my
child, and he still wanted to nurse, I would do my best to keep it private,
to protect him from future trauma.

Teresa Pitman
Guelph, Ontario (who is leaving for vacation tomorrow, hurray!)

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