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From:
Winnie Mading <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Fri, 27 Jun 2008 17:48:21 -0500
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Since noone else has commented, I will.  I decided I should really watch the program before passing judgement.  I my initial concerns are not only reinforced, but increased.  At first glance it sounds like a great idea to burst the bubble of those teens who think having a baby before getting an education, job or permanent, stable relationship would be just about the nestest thing and certainly not as much work as everyone thinks it is.  However, the set-up situations were far from realistic.  First of all, they were all set up in very nice fully furnished homes in a suburban cul-de-sac setting.  How many of these kids could have really been in such a setting as a teen coiupole, let alone with a baby? The girls were supposed to spend just one day wearing an "empathy belly".  One stubbornly refused, but she was still allowed to continue with the program.  Actually her boyfriend wore it-just what many pg moms would love to be able to do-make daddy be pg half the time!  A realistic experience of what pregnancy is like, right!?  Then they were given "babies" as old as 9 months.  Now, from our point of view a 9-month old might not be quite as bad off (although certainly no piece of cake for the baby/chld) in a strange situation as a newborn just beginning to get used to the world outside the womb, but it certainly doesn't give a picture of what life can be like with a newborn!  The teen couples were given "instruction books" written by the parents which was basically a "here is what we do when little Johnny does such and such.  Here is when he eats and sleeps etc.".  How many of our babies came with detailed instructions???  The parents were able to watch everything by closed-circuit TV and in a couple cases they did interrupt, but it was more to instruct the teens on how they wanted their child disciplined than any concern about the child's emotional health.  In addition, there was a nanny on duty in each house 24 hours a day.  This person did no cares and gave no advice, but was there just to intervene if at any time she felt the baby was in any PHYSICAL danger.  Since the physical cencerns and risks were addressed, I suspect most child protective services would be perfectly happy with the arrangement.

HOWEVER, the concerns about the emotional well being of the babies were absolutely reinforced.  I felt that they showed definite separation problems.  One baby (I think she was about 6 months old) had been cared for primarily by her at-home dad.  At one point the dad visited because he missed his little girl.  She immediately became an adorable smiling tyke-until dad left.  Of course, none of them appeared to be breastfeeding, so the teens were being given the message that bottle/formula is the norm (or perhaps I should say that idea was being reinforced).  One 9 month old would not eat- a reaction to separation?- and the advice of the parent was basically to "make the child eat".  Another was told they had to put the child to bed and ignore the crying!

Yes, these teens may come away with less disire to become early parents, but at what cost to the babies and what cost to their parenting attitudes and skills later on when they do have kids?

Winnie

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