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Subject:
From:
Rachel Myr <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Fri, 29 Dec 2000 10:53:10 +0100
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Marie Davis noted that (some) 'doctors can't seem to believe that women can
take control of their own fertility'.   I worked at a student health service
at a large university where we saw the whole gamut of fertility control.
Part of my job was ordering pregnancy tests and offering emergency
contraception and referral for appropriate follow-up according to the
woman's needs as defined by her, within the boundaries set by law.  On bad
days, we used to ventilate our frustration, among ourselves, over the very
few women who repeatedly showed up worried and yet had great difficulties
deciding to contracept regularly.
I would like to join my voice with Jennifer Tow's here.
Choosing to do nothing and take whatever life or your ovaries sends you, is
one form of taking control.  It is also the right of women to make that
choice, whether it matches our idea of what they 'should' do or not.  In
addition, they have the right to be treated with respect for their choice,
and to have good care which is tailored to their particular situation.
They do not have the right to expect that everyone providing their care
would make the same choices given the same options.  But the respect is
non-negotiable.
I will add that respect sometimes means giving information with no holds
barred instead of trying to be as kind as possible and thus preventing a
woman from learning the consequences of a decision.  If I respect someone,
that means I believe in their ability to learn and to continue growing as
long as they live.  Sometimes such a conversation reveals that there is a
strong desire to make a new decision here and now.  Surprisingly (TIC) often
the passive decision has occurred in a context of non-respect for the woman.
If anyone sees any parallels here which relate to BF/artificial feeding, so
much the better.
Rachel Myr
who has no trouble believing the monstrous stories in Jennifer's post,
unfortunately, and who knows that lawsuits are what result when people don't
get respect by any other route.
Kristiansand, Norway

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