Sue,

I think as soon as we tell mothers that their "hearts" towards their babies
are wrong, and they need to follow a method in a book, or a rule, rather than
the God-given heart yearning for our babies that is put into mothers on
purpose, then as a mother, we can no longer trust what our hearts say.  One
of the most empowering things we can do is to teach the mother to trust
herself and trust the baby; to watch, look, and listen to what the baby is
telling us.  Does that mean putting the baby to breast at "every peep?"  No,
it means to pay attention to what the baby needs each and every time.
 Sometimes that means to take the baby to bed; sometimes it means to wear her
in a sling; sometimes it means to snuggle; sometimes it means to take off
another of those blankets; sometimes it means to bf every hour or so....

When we tell a mom she has to raise a baby by a book (any book), and/or by
someone's "method," then we effectively negate her own sense of self-worth,
and render her incapable of making appropriate decisions for her child.
 Also, we put her on the defensive, because if the "method" isn't working,
then she has been convinced that it isn't the "method" that is at fault, but
she, because she has done it incorrectly.  That puts her to blame....

I wonder what "method" Eve used.....

Jan B. (who suffered because she was raised by someone's "method" -- Truby
King's? and holdovers from John Dolby? Watson? -- some goofy
childrearing-type psychologist from the 20's and the 40's.  But who was potty
trained at 6 months!! But isn't as intelligent as some because for some
reason her mother didn't have enough milk -- feeding every four hours on one
side only....)