Gonneke has very nicely described a common source of unnecessary worry by
mothers of older babies.  Even at a younger age, mothers may become
concerned about self-diagnosed “breast refusal”, simply because of two
natural scenarios.  1) The baby has suddenly gone from long, leisurely
breastfeeds to short ones with efficient milk transfer and won’t take any
more after finishing.  2) The baby has become very easily distracted and
needs to be somewhere quiet (even on a chair beside the bath or a darkened
room).

 

My first consultation on moving to Brisbane many years ago involved the
first of these scenarios.  The mother’s previous baby had had suck problems,
and so she assumed this was happening again, but starting later.  This was
at a time when the fad was to assign absolutely every breastfeeding
“problem” to “poor positioning and attachment”, and she was getting more and
more frustrated trying to get the (excellent) attachment “right”.  Of
course, attachment had absolutely nothing to do with her situation.
Unfortunately, by the time she contacted me and I took into account the
baby’s previous history and current age, and observed her baby, she had
become so certain it “had” to be positioning and attachment that she was
reluctant to believe there was *no* problem.  (I imagine she thought I just
didn’t know, since I hadn’t found a problem!)

 

Yes, I’m back on Lactnet for a visit, after an incredibly busy year.
Despite the long time in hospital, completely bed-bound, and then in rehab
till early-March, this has been one of my best and busiest years.
Everything I set out to do has been achieved, along with a whole lot of
unexpected commitments, and I’ve been away a number of times.  The x-rays in
October showed that one of the fractures hadn’t completely knitted, but it
is held rigid by lots of metal and I have excellent mobility.  Feels great.
Months ago I resumed using public transport.  I am grateful to the many
Lactnetters who contacted me during my 3 ½ months in hospital, with cards
and messages.  The warmth I felt from members of this caring, online
community remains with me.  Thank you.

 

Warmly

Virginia

 

Dr Virginia Thorley, OAM, PhD, GD Counselling, IBCLC, FILCA

Honorary Research Fellow

School of History, Philosophy, Religion & Classics

The University of Queensland, QLD 4072

Australia

 

Gonneke wrote:

What I do see quite a lot is not real breast refusal at this age, but
miscommunication between mom and child, or rather mom having unrealistic
expectations of normal bigger baby behaviour. At this age many babies seem
to need/want multiple little snacks at breast during the day, where mom
tends to expect the cultural norm of ''decent meals''. So babe pops on and
off after a couple of minutes, ready to continue playing, where mom has been
installing herself for a a meal of one breast-burp-other breast-burp and
both breasts for a certain amount of time in order to ''reach the good
milk''.

 


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