Donna,
Perhaps this mom does have something in her constitution that makes
her more likely to be tired out by nursing, but my first instinct is
that she is harboring unrealistic expectations.  Just to provide a
point of contrast, my midwife *insists* on two full weeks of bedrest
for all of her clients.  (She came to see me on the third day after
my son was born at home, and scolded me (nicely of course) for being
:::gasp::: dressed and sitting on the couch!  "Margaret, I'm very
disappointed to see that you're wearing (pause) *clothes*.  LOL)
Part of my prenatal care with her involved specifying exactly who was
going to be helping me out & when for the two weeks after the birth.
She encourages new moms to hire postpartum help if there is no family
to fill the role.  It seems fairly common for traditional societies
to have around 40 days or six weeks of prescribed rest and seclusion
for new moms.  Is it coincidental that six weeks is often a "magic
number" for breastfeeding success?  We need to respect this "fourth
trimester" of childbearing.

Anyway, I would try to help this mom explore options for taking a
couple of weeks off from household & childcare duties -- other than
caring for the newborn of course.  Can she have relatives come and
stay to care for the older children?  How much time can the father
take off work?  Does she have a freezer that can be stocked with
several weeks' worth of meals (this is an excellent baby-shower
theme/gift -- families usually don't need much "stuff" for a fourth
child anyway!)?  She should nap when the baby naps, sleep when the
baby sleeps.  Hire a housecleaner for 2 or 4 or 6 weeks -- or request
this as a baby gift.  Or just consider lowering her expectations
waaaaay down for awhile.  I bet dollars to doughnuts that with
adequate rest and pampering, she'll feel reasonably well.

Does she practice co-sleeping?  If not, that is a suggestion to make
to maximize her rest.

Be sure to point out that formula feeding is a lot of work and may
tire her out *more*.  Play up the greater likelihood of baby's
illnesses keeping her up at night, unplanned doctor visits, etc etc.

Margaret
Longmont, CO

>I have a question from a mum expecting her fourth child. This feeling of
>exhaustion lasts for about a month and seems to be more than "just
>feeling tired". She's quite concerned about what will happen when this
>next baby is born. Her story:
<snip>

>Donna Hansen
>Burnaby, British Columbia

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