Sue, I understand your need to go on in private as this seems to go beyond the aim of this list. Nevertheless to me it seems a too good opportunity to throw in cultural differences. 

I don't even know how to express it so you will understand :-) Looking at the world, feeling as you do, is not a stand-alone thing. It has a cultural perspective, a 'how-to' from your part of the world and it is more embedded in your personality then you think.

We probably all think of ourselves as reasonably smart women with a critical view, not buying BS. But are we? I am not too sure about that, although I would love to think it :-) 
Going the other way, being critical - is also based on the culture you're from. In my part of the world it is a pro, as long as you pay your taxes. A free spirit, oh, look at me how independent I am, thinking completely for myself - I have come to the age where I know that is simply not true. 

There are cultures that are based on shame and guilt. Embarrassing yourself, your family, bringing shame, familyhonour.......people kill for it. Or are killed because of it. From that perspective I am certain 'feeling guilty' or 'make you feel guilty' is a cultural influenceble thing. 

Even dogs can look embarrassed, but only if they are punished.

Lydia, LLL, Netherlands

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