Last year on January 3 I wrote a wrenching letter to Lactnet about all of
the moms who had, during the last days of the old year, halted their efforts
at breastfeeding their babies.  The situations within which they stopped
were quite resolvable, from my point of view, and I was feeling responsible
and most inadequate.  I received many beautiful, caring, empathetic posts
from Lactnetters who said, "I've been there." or "I am seeing the same
thing." or "It is the holidays with all of the stresses and heightened
expectations." and "Don't let the turkeys get you down."  I felt
tremendously supported and affirmed.

I didn't quit my practice. And this December/January I was ready. I
cautioned everyone I was working with, even more than I usually do, about
too many visitors, putting mom and baby before the wishes of relatives, and
naps, naps, naps. I told them about the high incidence of giving up during
the holidays, and encouraged them to hang in there at least 'till January
when all of the "loving family" would be back at work and it would be just
"baby and me." I was sensitive to just how much hard work they were able to
do at this time, and was very understanding of their desire to be a part of
the festivities while trying to learn to be Mother.

And I reminded myself of my limitations as LC and that I can't do it for
them. Even if all 5 of them stopped it doesn't mean that I don't know how to
do this work.  I had a good time myself and took care of me. I also read
through all of the lovely posts you sent.

Well, as of today, 4 are still breastfeeding, with only one still needing my
help and she is one of those heroic ones. And the one who has decided that
she won't make enough milk for her baby is going to "do both."  She is
giving almost all of her baby's food as abm but is feeding him at the breast
both before and after feedings. So actually she is "breastfeeding" too.

One problem we encountered is that many of their physicians were on
vacation.  This time of year is a lousy time to have a baby. The mom who is
giving mostly abm never had fullness of her breasts and 1 oz was the max. of
her pumping.  I wanted her to have blood work done for underactive thyroid
or exploration of retained placenta.  But her doc was gone and when she went
to the office for the blood drawing the nurses were "so comforting about how
much she had gone through already" and they talked her into not pursuing the
cause of her insufficient milk supply.

Once again, I say how valuable Lacntet is for information and support.  And
the much-deserved 1 1/2 day "vacation" she took this week was a reminder to
us of her worth.

The most *disturbing* thing about her time off was how much I accomplished
around the house during those hours with no posts to read (and no clients to
see). I got 3/4 way through de-cluttering a closet that had become a major
receptacle for "stuff." I repotted 5 plants. I completed a couple of
cleaning projects...and on and on.

Then I remembered that I am a home-based LC and my work requires that I keep
myself informed and connected to others in the field. Just because I am at
home doesn't mean that I am "at home." I could be in medical libraries
researching all of this stuff, but it would be inadequate anyway.  So, when
Lactnet returned Friday afternoon I just rejoiced--even though the volume
was a bit of a shock.

We really help each other in our work, whether we are asking the question or
giving our views on it.

I strongly urge the new Lactnetters to use the Archives.  Many of your
concerns are what we all have dealt with or are still dealing with and there
is a wealth of solutions and perspectives in the Archives.  If you don't
know how to access it, ask someone. It is not difficult at all. It is not
that we don't want to answer your question at this time, but if you do a
search you will get 38 views instead of 3 or 4, and you can still ask for
clarification or update if you need to.  Some people who used to write often
are too busy to write now, and their excellent ideas are preserved for us
all to read.

Happy New Year to all of you.  May 1998 be a year of tremendous growth in
the realm of breastfeeding. It holds such promise and here we are, ready to
be a part of it all.

Patricia Gima, IBCLC
Milwaukee



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