FROM: Sturgess, Frances Coulter
TO:[log in to unmask]
SUBJECT: watch yr language
DATE: 02-20-97   12:42 EST
PRIORITY:


Been thinking about teaching/advocacy approaches and it struck me how
inappropriate it is to discuss "advantages vs disadvantages" of feeding
methods.  Perhaps it is only semantics, and we are *worrying* too much about
how the message is sent, but the more I think about it, the more it bothers
me.  It is too argumentative/implications that there are serious disadv. to
say, brfdg.  IT also minimizes the emotional component of choice--who of us
isalways "rational" about the choices we knowingly make?  Even
"risks/benefits" seem too cut and dried.

How about--consequences?  And let the mom decide what consequences she would
rather live with, rather than telling her that there are disadvantages she
will have to live with, which may make them sound worse than they are, or
advantages, which particularlywith ABM makes it sound better than it is.
I am reminded too, when it seems like we must focus so much on Problems, of
Karen Gromada's introduction in Mothering Multiples/La Leche League:"..it
occurred to me that so much of this seemed to focus on the negative aspects
ofmothering multiples.  I felt frustrated because my overall experience {was}
sopositive.  THen it suddenly dawned on me.You don't need a book to help you
enjoy... being the center of two babies universe..The positive aspects of
mothering multiples are manyfold, to be experienced with joy.  it is for the
difficulties that assistance is required."

Of course with few role models, many women have no clue as to the joy a brfd
baby can bring and may see only the negative in classes.  Take joy!