Lisa wrote:

Nursing  mom is a childcare provider to toddlers. She was told by the
counselor to  one of the children's siblings that breastfeeding in front of
the children  is traumatizing them and causing them grief because they are
young and  experiencing their first separation from their mothers.  One of
the  children has recently begun nursing (because of her experince of
watching  the care giver nurse) and the others have varied histories of being
nursed,  (some have either asked to nurse again or are nursing their dolls)
some  quite briefly, all with some breast time. One child is adopted from
abroad  and spent a year in an orphanage and does have attachment issues
which the  family is actively addressing. I have never looked at this from
such a  perspective. Any ideas?



The first thing I think of is broadening the argument: this is not just  
about breastfeeding, it's about mothering. One could make the same argument that  
since these children are newly separated from their mothers and cannot be held 
 by them, this woman should not be able to hold her infant either. The only  
reason a child would be ''traumatized' by seeing another nurse, is if they 
were  forcibly and prematurely weaned, in my opinion. A gently weaned toddler 
might be  curious while watching another child nurse and even  interested  in 
beginning again but that is not the same as being  traumatized.
If the nursling is a toddler there can surely be ways to gently discuss how  
different families make different decisions, and show respect and care, in the 
 same way that a childcare place serving milk would be respectful and have  
something else for a child with a dairy problem. If the nursling is a newborn,  
the toddlers can be helped to understand that babies need things that 
toddlers  don't. Of course if they are young toddlers I agree they might actually 
need to  have continued nursing, then we are talking family's own feelings about 
their  premature wearning decisions coming out as anger, or 'trauma" talk...
Peace,
Judy, leaving for a lovely retreat with women friends...:)  

Judy LeVan  Fram, PT, IBCLC, LLLL, Brooklyn, USA


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