Catherine Watson Genna said:
If moms think bottle is easy, breast is hard, many of them are not willing
to allow their baby even a moment's frustration on the way to learning to
breastfeeding.

Isn't this what many of us actually DO?  Help mom deal with her baby's
frustration while we continue giving opportunities for the baby to "get it".
Then, the baby finally does (most of the time.and the mom is SO excited
about what WE did . when in fact what we did was help her deal with the
"errors" before she gets to the "home run"!  (Sorry, but that metaphor just
slipped out - and I'm not a baseball fan, so it may even be incorrect,
should I have said "strike outs?")

So many times I'm told "baby won't take the breast" for whatever reason - it
may be bottles, nipple shields, etc.  When I ask mom to SHOW me, she puts
the baby "kind of" near the breast, he pulls away and cries, and she quits.
As we talk and I help, she learns to deal with her baby's frustration (and
her own) and also learns to tolerate a bit of fussing, crying, pulling away
(after all, every time before the baby had gotten NOTHING at the breast, why
should he think it would be any different right now?), and then we get the
baby in the RIGHT (for him)position, and milk flows and suddenly.silence
(except for some lovely gulping).  Now the mom looks amazed, then becomes
more secure that her baby CAN do it, and is willing to help him learn how to
come to the breast.

I'm not saying this ALWAYS is the case - I have had my share of nursing
strikes and failures to latch - but much more often I've found that getting
mom and baby together and getting them going CAN be done with some
"cheerleading" and "coaching".

In fact, when I use the Self attachment video from the Lancet study in
presentations (sold by Geddes.and by the way I get NO financial benefit from
mentioning it), I always show the third baby but turn down the music to make
sure people LOOK at the baby who is obviously crawling up to the breast -
while crying.  If mom had gone by that, she would have stopped the baby
because he is "frustrated," probably tried to put him to the breast and he
may have pulled away - but as it was, he found his own way there and latched
on.  That is one method I've also used with great success. (I tell moms some
babies are like teen-agers and "want to do it themselves".)

I like this thread because I also want to stress that just because babies
have gotten pacifiers, bottles or nipple shields does NOT mean they can
never learn how to breastfeed.  We need to make sure mom knows that it is
worth it to go through some frustration, however, if we label the baby as
suffering from "nipple confusion" that gives the mother the "out" to quit
trying.

I often tell mom - this means we have to teach the baby how great it is to
breastfeed.  When your child finds it difficult to read or learn math - you
will remember this and know that he CAN do it with your help. You're
learning how to deal with your child's frustration while helping him get to
where he needs to go.

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, PHN, IBCLC
Vacaville, CA

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