Kathy Dettwyler asks: "Why are we not all mourning the fact that our
elbows/shoulders/ear lobes "never have a chance to play erotically"?

Because not all of us are missing that experience?  Have any of us disclosed
our own practices related to these, or other, body parts?  (And that is NOT
a request for such disclosure, please!)

This thread continues to puzzle me, because I never personally experienced
being forced, or even asked, to choose one over the other.  Breastfeeding to
me did not mean reserving my breasts and the sensations from them for solemn
work-related purposes, and eroticism did not mean depriving my children of
their food.

I understand that a cultural norm which considers these things mutually
exclusive is harmful when eroticism precludes good infant care.  I just know
we don't have to buy into it.  Culture is as dynamic as human beings are.
We can own our breasts and define their meaning ourselves.  Honest.

My claim, bold and thoughtless though it may seem, is that you CAN have your
cake and play with it too.
Rachel Myr
Kristiansand, Norway

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