I was not going to say anything this time around.....but......

I have worked with many active duty moms. Many make breastfeeding and  
parenting in general work!  But....it all depends on what their duty  
is within the military. Not all moms can add on to their maternity  
leave even if they have the leave time built up...as I have said  
before on this topic a few months ago, the mission comes first.  Many  
women are not thinking about having a family when they enter military  
service;therefore, they do not know how things will change.  Some  
women realize early on and separate from the military, some realize  
they would prefer to stay home when it is too late to be able to  
separate, and they wait it out until then can.  Some women choose to  
stay in because they WANT to.  I do my best to offer support and help  
to make it work.  I know one woman from the local coast guard station  
who was able to get a pump room put in on the base!

No one forced anyone to sign on that dotted line--and it is made clear  
that once you do...you belong to Uncle Sam--like it or not.  When my  
husband enlisted, I was asked to come in to be sure that I understood  
the commitment that not only he, but I was making once he signed on  
that line.

This said....the reality is this is the military......men and women  
have to be ready to deploy at a moment's notice, especially in time of  
war.  My husband(who was raised in a breastfeeding culture and is the  
dad of 4 breastfed babies)  supervises many, and he will support moms,  
but if they cannot do their job, he will tell you, they need to  
leave.  He also says the same for any man, if he cannot do the job, he  
needs to leave because if you cannot do your job, someone else will  
have to be called up to do it--someone who may have been deployed for  
6 months, a year or more, just returned, and now has to leave again to  
take the place of someone who could not go.

Active duty dads do not have it easy either.  My husband-- in the  
almost 21 years WE have  been in the military-- has missed many  
critical times in the lives of our children. I have seen the bond  
forged early between he and my oldest child destroyed due to all the  
separations. I have seen the bond between he and my son not solidified  
because he saw him once at birth and then not again until 9 months  
later.  Thankfully, now that my children are older, 19 and 17, they  
understand their dad's sacrifices and the three of them are now  
actively trying to rebuild what they loss. I have been the one  
constant in my children's lives--I have been able to stay home and  
always be there for them--even still, not having a dad there has not  
been easy for them.

Why not get out?  My husband grew up in a war torn Vietnam. The  
American soldiers made an impression on him, and he decided that when  
he came to the United States, he would "pay back" as it were--not only  
the soldiers, but the country that took in his family and helped them  
to start a new life.  He is committed to the service of this country  
and my children and I support him.


Back to lurking....

Kind Regards,
Gloria Thai,
Virginia

             ***********************************************

Archives: http://community.lsoft.com/archives/LACTNET.html
To reach list owners: [log in to unmask]
Mail all list management commands to: [log in to unmask]
COMMANDS:
1. To temporarily stop your subscription write in the body of an email: set lactnet nomail
2. To start it again: set lactnet mail
3. To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet
4. To get a comprehensive list of rules and directions: get lactnet welcome